Hints to Entertainers

NZ Truth, Issue 1029, 15 August 1925, Page 11

Hints to Entertainers

Oh, my dear New Zealander, There's a sailor come to you From the Great Amurkan Desert where • They all know how to forew, . ■ Treat him kindly, entertain him, , - Make his visit rwell enjoyed — As I>m P rett -y sure it will 'be, if a few things you avoid, ww . Just because ho says "I reckon," o>\A^ And his papers brand him Yank, . . . ' . — - Don't jump to the conclusion that his . . .S= i first name must (be Hank. And I hate to disappoint you, ■*%. But I'm forced to say it's so: It's NOT Manhattan Etiquette to call the Captain "Bo." n> Don't ask him (whence the "Gob" came, • Though the mystery makes you sweat-r ( It possibly is just the thing he came here to forget. And, on bended knees I. ask you I implore you, I entreat. Don't tell him what the term connotes on Queen or Willis Street. And you Mayors of several cities, You should not by any means Allow the Civio Banquet to consist of only Beans! But you'll win the Fleet's affection If you permanently fix The clocks throughout the city so it's always nine to six! Don't forget if you would hold him (It's no matter what you think) / You must pass the Freeman's Password, "Cobber, come. an' have a drink." And remember, please, that "Dinkum," Even "Bosker," I've .been told, ' , And "Flaming Cows" and "Sheilas" leave the man from 'Murka cold. And if you pitch him stretchers Of the treacle-mlne you own. Don't >be surprised to hear about the YonkeTS he has grown. And, lastly, though to stop it You must chew the parlor mat, FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE DON'T ASK HIM WHERE HE GOT THE FUNNY HAT! — C.H.O.