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New Zealand Times, Volume LI, Issue 12022, 27 December 1924, Page 14

A .Tew was so ill that a trained nureo had to be sent for. When she came on duty her first remark was: “Now I’ll take your temperature I” “You can’t!” protested the Jew, defiantly; “everything’s in my wife's name!” A curate who bad attended a race meeting wa sasked by a friend if he had ! spoiled the winner? “Oh. quite easily. 1 thanks,” replied the curate, ‘‘The ; jockey wore such bright colours and was iso far ahead that I spotted him at | once I” i Master: “Now, John, teii me bow ; you would go to Newfoundland?” | Pupil: “I should first go to Liverpool.” “Yes, and then?” “Then I should get on hoard the ship; and then—then I should ask the captain, who, of course, knows tho way better than I do.” • “Dinah,” arid the mistress, “I hear 'you are married.” “Yassum. I’se got a good man now,” “Does he provide for you all right?” "Yas, he a good I provider, hut I’se skeered he going to j be cotched at it.”