THE BULL AND THE DUDE.

New Zealand Times, Volume LVII, Issue 2543, 22 June 1895, Page 2 (Supplement)

THE BULL AND THE DUDE.

In his interesting book on New Zealand, Mr Hay gives a graphic sketch of an Englishman who was considered a “ dude ":—

Mr Hay and his neighbours were hard at work trying to subdue a wild young bull, and after they had spent an hour or more to no purpose, who should come up but this same Dandy Jack, recognisable from afar by the extravagant cleanliness and. daintiness of his apparel I He was hailed with a volley of sarcasm and personalities, amid which he stood, hands in pocket and pipe in mouth, placidly surveying the situation. At last he said, in his softest and most delicate tones, “ I see before me a number of gentlemen, hot, dirty and disagreeable, standing about a stockyard. There seems to be a difficulty somewhere. Can I assist in removing it?" He was answered by a burly giant of a bushman who had scant knowledge of the dandy. “ P’raps you’ll be so polite as to show us how to capsize that beast,"he said. “ Oh, certainly—with all the pleasure in life!" responded Dandy Jack urbanely. “ Will you kindly keep ray pipe alight for a minute!" Then to everybody’s amazement, he vaulted over the fence, and approached the bull. Instantly down went the animal’s head and up went his tail, as he charged upon the sauntering figure. But Jack dodged the rush with the nimbleness of a practised picador, and the bull crashed against the fence. Again and again the same performance was repeated, while the men ell watched round the fence, calling to Jack at intervals to come out. He only nodded carelessly, and continued to saunter about. Presently the bull stood stock-still, then commenced pawning the ground, tossing his held and tail, bellowing and eyeing Jack, who was leisurely moving towards him, right in front. Apparently the bull had grown tired, and was uncertain what to do next. So Dandy Jack walked on till he was within a yard or two of the bull's nose. The moment his angry head went down Dandy Jack sprang at him. It was all done so quickly that the lookers-on could hardly distinguish what was happening. They saw Jack seize one of the bull’s horns with both hands and place his foot upon the other. Then came a wrench and a wrestle ; Jack whirled through the air and fell lightly on the ground half a dozen yards off, but the bull lay rolling on his back. That twist of his head had overbalanced him, and before he could scramble to his feet the lookers-on were over the fence and had him securely tied. A few minutes later Jack was quietly sitting on the carcase of his late antagonist. With his usual care he was brushing off the dust and dirt that had soiled his clothes. Then Dandy said, with elaborate affectation of languor and softness, “ Look here, old fellow; you don’t understand what a bull is ! I’ll tell you. It is a thing that some people look at from the safe side of the fence, and that other people take by the horns."