PEOPLE WHO OUGHT TO REFORM.

New Zealand Times, Volume LIV, Issue 9866, 24 March 1893, Page 4

PEOPLE WHO OUGHT TO REFORM.

List No, 3. The Insurance Agent The Bank Manager The Butcher The insurance agent who meeteth ns in the street, smileth benignantly, poketh us in the riba gently and familiarly, and subtly Insinuated that we looketh ill and deathlike, and askoth ns whether we thinketh it the square thing to marry a beautiful, blushing bride (meaning Mrs Blank) and then leave her to the mercy of a cold, cold world, unprovided for. We meekly ask, " Where wo come In ? ” and bo immediately denounoeth ns with great and exceeding wrathfnlnese, and thereupon he leaveth us with the mysterious remark, "I’m coming up to see yon one day on business," and it is only then that we realise that the Inhuman monster has been simply paving the way tor the said business. Notwithstanding .his reflection, wo feel utterly and nnmitl. gotingly miserable, and are constrained In consequence to adjourn to the nearest refreshment bar at which we revive ourselves by partaking of alittle light refreshment —to wit, Bocitanan’s House of Commons Whisky. We are now more than ever convinced that the Insurance agent ought to reform. The man (or, to speak more appropriately) "that person” that denies that Hodhe of Commons Whisky is the only Scotch whisky that is supplied to the House of Commons, that sayeth it (the whisky we moon) Is not the purest and btat —the moat agreeable and delicate to the taste—bo ought to reform or migrate to the place where " untruthfulnees is bliss,” and where “ ’Tis folly to bo otherwise.” The butcher, who palmeth off on to hie too confiding customers the flesh of some ancient sheep, and calleth it " Prime young lamb." The bank manager, who invariably ailenosth a clamorous customer, and instantly reduces him to abjeot subjection by mysterious references to that great bogie man—the imaginary general manager or nspeotor. ®