TWO REMARKABLE COINCIDENCES.

New Zealand Mail, 21 February 1901, Page 12

TWO REMARKABLE COINCIDENCES.

“I Avas riding ,on a street car in Chicago,” said the man with the prominent Adam’s apple, “and when I came to pay my fare I discovered that I had but four pennies. Not another red cent could I rake up, and I had a down-town, appointment Avorth 10,000 dollars to me. Would the conductor put me off P One glance into his cold grey eyes told me that T could expect no mercy from him. .-.I glanced o\ r er the passengers, but-they Avere a cold and selfish lot. What was to be done? My heart thumped heavily against my ribs, the perspiration streamed down my face in rßulets, and I felt my knees knock together. “‘Fare, sir; fare!’ “The conductor had just uttered the words in icy tones and was looking me over as the tiger does its victim, when. I happened to drop my eyes to the floor, and there —and there, gentlemen, lay a cent —just the. cent I wanted to make up my fare. I caught my breath and gasped, and then picked it up, and handed, over my five. In a hystericky -way I tried to say something to- thq conductor, something funny, but he regarded me with stern mein for a. few seconds, and then said as he passed on—- “ ‘About one more cocktail would upset your apple cart, old felloAv!” “I had sent my wife into- the country for a month,” said the man with the gold tooth and the portly stomach. f ‘l knew she needed the pure air and the fresh eggs and milk, and I knew I needed a break in the monotony of home life. Yes, gentlemen, I made up my mind that while she! was gone I’d go to the club; get drunk, spree around, have a whooping old time. She started ope morning, and that night I painted 'he town red'. The next night I lost 200 dollars at poker and got gloriously drunk. On the third night, just as I was about to start out on another hilarious bust, the family parrot called out to me : “ ‘Beware! Beiware! Don’t go! Don’t go.!’ \

-“I laughed his* croaking to scorn at first, but presently & queer feeling came oyer me. I determined to change the programme) and go to my lodge that night, and to drink nothing stronger than soda water, and get home by ten o’clock. I carried out my intentions, and the bells were just striking ten as I entered the house, with a song on my lips, and goodness in my heart. “ ‘So it’s you, is it ?’ exclaimed a voice as I turned on the electric light, and I wheeled to find my wife standing there with a club- “ Yes, gentlemen, she had, come home thinking to trap me/ and wave after wave of chagrin and disappointment swept over her face as she realised /hat I had actually beeta. to my lodge, was in a sober state, and had got home two hours earlier than usual. She dropped the club and shed many and bitter tears j and next day I bought that parrot a collar of silver, on which was insoribed, ‘Hie jacet solus/ which is Latin for /Put mel on again, old bird/—“Boston Globe/’