Marrying Again.
A bachelor of the town asks us for our views as to this very important and interesting matter : Which is the more righteous and noble action for a husband or wife, in case of the death of the other, to sacrifice all comfort of further home life and live on singly in everlasting memory of the dear departed, or to marry again, for one reason or another, and thereby stamp the act of marriage simply as a partnership for the sake of one convenience or another, which shall be renewed according to emergency and chance ? The opinion that a man should be true forever to his first and only wife, or vice versa, and that he should console himself, in case of death, not with another mate, but with the sweet memory of the past and the hopes of an immortal future life, has in our home circle been declared ridiculous and laughable. The opinion that death ends all and gives a new lease for marriage each time ad Infinitum, if greater comfort is gained thereby, was applauded and accepted as the proper thing. Now, what do you think ? Happily married people, and more especially wives, are usually unable to conceive it possible that they should ever marry again. The thought that death may come iu to separate them is inexpressibly pain, tul, and naturally so. They would rather believe that their conjugal union is for all eternity, indissoluble, and that the parting whicn mortality compels is for a brief period only. Hence the sentiment is often expressed by them that marriage with any other would seem to them rank infidelity to the departed, and that their consolation, as our bachelor correspondent put it, would be in 4 the sweet memory of the past,’ nob in taking another mate. They would be married to the dead rather than to any living.
So they feel, honestly and Bincerely,. and the sentiment does credit to their conjugal devotion. And yet, the more complete the happiness o£ a marriage, the more likely it may be that when death has broken it up the survivor will make use of the opportunity to take a new partner. As time passes,the consolations of the ‘sweet memory of the past ’ grow shadowy and unsatisfactory. They do not take away the feeling of loneliness, and do not lessen the desire for the companionship of marriage. Therefore it happens that oftentime the widowers and the widows who have most deeply mourned are more than usually susceptible to the tender paesion. A new love brings unexpected consolation. The sweet memory of the past may remain, but the actual sympathy of the living present exceeds it in power. The disposition to make the matrimonial experiment again is rather increased because the first was so completely successful, while if the first was unsuccessful a second trial may be made with a hope of doing better.—N. Y. Sun.
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https://paperspast.natlib.govt.nz/newspapers/NZMAIL18900103.2.7.13
Bibliographic details
New Zealand Mail, Issue 931, 3 January 1890, Page 5
Word Count
487Marrying Again. New Zealand Mail, Issue 931, 3 January 1890, Page 5
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