Bad Tempered Ruler of Whiz Bang

New Zealand Herald, Volume LXXV, Issue 22949, 29 January 1938, Page 8 (Supplement)

Bad Tempered Ruler of Whiz Bang

TT was ]iis birthday and the King of Whizz-bang was in a towering rage. The whole court was in fear and trembling as to what would happen next. He had already thrown most of his presents into the river that danced past the palace. A smart new crown studded with emeralds and diamonds, a royal blue velvet dinner suit, trimmed with ermine collar and culls, two dainty jade ash trays and an opalheaded walking-stick, holus-bolus ho had dumped into the river. He laughed wickedly as he stood at a turret window and watched them floating past. After he had torn the diamond buckles oil' a pair of beautiful crimson slippers he gave them to the white cockatoo for supper. Luckily it only pecked them to pieces and spat them out when ifc discovered they were not corn. The king then set to and smashed all the palace windows with a small silver hammer. Now the King of Whizz-bane was in the habit of flying into towering rages, but the court usually knew the reason why. But on this occasion, no one appeared to know, not even the queen. " Whatever did the king want to smash all the windows for," they muttered under their breaths. They dared not say it aloud in case the king heard about' it and imprisoned them lor treason. Oh, yes, it was frightfully awkward and especially as the court glazier refused to work on holidays, windows or no windows. It was a perfect ])iar\el that the chef and his scullions were able to prepare the enormous dinner under such draughty conditions. Nevertheless. they did so, and promptly at one o'clock a small page banged "the huge Chinese gong, summoning their majesties and courtiers to dinner. They proudly filed into the great banqueting hall, and took their respective places around the large table. It was bitterly cold, and an icy-footed wind was slithering around the room. *'Varlets, shut the windows," commanded the king 4 Tray, calm yourself, my dear," the queen said. " Don't you observe that

By IVY GIBBS

In the middle of cutting a large slice for the king she started to sneeze. This sent a spray of holly dancing ott the pudding right on to the top ot the kind's head. He was sitting at the opposite end of tho table. J'.veiyone shrieked with laughter; even the king joined in, although the joke was against himself. For quite a long time they all laughed and joked, appearing to have forgotten about the cold, draughty room. J hey stuck their paper caps on at jaunty angles, cracked their nuts and ate their raisins in a thoroughly jolly holiday mnnner. The king summoned the court jester and commanded him to entertain them. The jester sidled into the room with an impish grin on his face. He tinkled all over as he moved, because little golden bells wore hung all over him. He swept off his peaked cap, bowed low to their majesties and recited in a high, cracked voice:— Tho Kin*? of Whizz-bant? is a jolly old boy, Except when he flies in a rage-O, And then al! kooil folk, 0 beware— 0 beware, From High Chamberlain down to tho I>"KC-0. He duniiM all his presents and everything else Into the small river below-O. Ho smashes the windows with hammer and things ... « And don't care a button or nsr-O. O! ynm-tiddle, yum-tiddle, yiim-tiddle-dee. He's really a wonderful King-O. Now let's toast his health in a bumper ol wine, „ And set all the rafters a-nncr-O. Suddenly, he commenced to sneeze. This set everyone else sneezing also, from their majesties down to the lucky black cat, who always sat at the queen's feet. A-tishoo, n-tishoo, a-tish-oo, A-T ISHO o—echoed and reechoed through the huge room. Of course, this completely broke up tho party. By five o'clock that day everyone had developed a permanent sneeze, a high temperature anil a grumpy temper. The court physician was summoned to investigate the cause. He felt _ pulses and looked at tongues. After doing so, lie declared them all to be Buttering from influenza contracted while partaking of dinner in a freezing room.