SHORT WAR STORIES.

New Zealand Herald, Volume LII, Issue 16020, 11 September 1915, Page 5 (Supplement)

SHORT WAR STORIES.

_■.;' ; , THE .RETORT COURTEOUS. The following is said to have happened ' where :in England":—''Hey, .what are .J ye t doin', s movin* iV the < ranks?*' shouted :■*- the f: corporal. . ..-.;.. D'ye 5 think ye: can mak' a fule o' me?" Private McNab | pondered a moment. " Ah'm ;no wantin' | tae . interfeer : with the coorse :o' nature," he said. V -*■...? - ■ <"■ ■ ,': ;, .-J." - t '* s

I WHY THE -; SWORD ; WAS - CURVED. . "Why is the blade of a sabre curved?" asked a sergeant who was instructing some new recruits in swordsmanship. '$ " I \ sup- ' pose 'it' is • curved vto give more force • to the blow," replied one of the men.. "Nonsense!" exclaimed the learned instructor. "The sabre is curved so as to make it fit the scabbard. • If it were straight, how on earth" would you get it into the crooked scabbard, eh?" , THE RECRUIT'S SALUTE. The recruit was having his first turn on sentry duty "Now remember your salutes," the corporal warned him. "If you see a lieutenant wearing one or two stars, slope arms. For a captain with three stars, slope arms also. The major has a cMwn on his straps, and you present a¥ms. For the colonel, who has stars and a crown, you present arms and,turn out the guard." When he was left alone the recruit went over these orders again and again. Suddenly his musing was interrupted by the approach of an officer. This was a general, and the recruit did not know what to do for him. "And which might you be ?" he asked bluntly, unable to recognise the badge of the officer's rank. "I'm the general," replied the officer affably. " Sure, now, and are ye!" exclaimed the recruit in consternation. " Then ye'll want something big. How'd it do if I give ye a bayonet exercise , GENERAL . GODLEY AND THE x KANGAROO. An amusing tale is recounted of a meeting between a wounded Australian and General Godlev in the gully leading to the beach near Gate Tepe. The man had had his foot riddled with shrapnel, and was being assisted down the gully by two other wounded men, when General Godley appeared. Hi. general," said the man, and the general looked up inquiringly." " I'm a blooming kangaroo all right, now, ain't I. general?" continued the intrepid Australian. The general smiled sympathetically, and recommended the man to get his foot dressed as soon as possible. Another amusing story, although there is a touch of pathos in it, is told by a major in the New Zealand Medical Corps about a wounded Australian. He was heard continually repeating the phrase "Not a — thing;"' and on being interrogated as to what he meant„repliea. "'I was first shot in the arm, and the doctor took away my tunic. ' Then I was shot in the side," and the doctor took away my shirt. Now I have been -shot in the leg,, and they have taken away my .trousers, ' and than, with a sigh, "Not a — thing." >v^; :.\-j >~sjk