LOCAL GOSSIP.

New Zealand Herald, Volume XXXIV, Issue 10407, 3 April 1897, Page 1 (Supplement)

LOCAL GOSSIP.

••let Bβ tow audience for & word or two." Shafostm. those dreadful woman of the Women's National Council have been in session again, displaying to the world their folly, and manifesting that they were unsexed creatares, neither male nor female, and yet preamiD" to speak in the name of the omen f the*colony. Tney have started now on mpere advocating land nationalisation. j hey want an old age pension, to which eTer ybody is to be entitled, and the money ( is to be raised by addition! to the income A resolution was proposed that) district court judges and stipendiary magistratee should be more independent, but this IB negatived, for the National woman is a staunch Government supporter. Then we have Mrs. Sierwright'i resolutions, " That the marriage laws of New Zealand should L rendered remedial, not merely palliative, of the disabilities at present grievously affecting married women, and that to this eD d the whole law relating to marriage, founded on the old doctrine of possession, should be repealed." This is the cry of these women. They want the whole marriage laws t0 be Bweb away, 0 that they may assume the lotty position of concubines. Then Mrs. Sievwrieht goes on to move " that erery married woman should be held to .bare and share alike the earnings or income of her husband," that her "share of the joint income should be paid to the wife's separate account, or that her name should be included with that of her husband in their common bank account." These resolutions were agreed to unanimously. When I have said that, I feel as if I could add nothing more completely condemnatory of the Women's National Council. Do these women, if they are women, not coneider that there is, or should be, such an element) as lovo in marriage, that if that exists, there is no need cf conditions as to a joint bank account. If that element is absent, all the conditions will not bring happiness. • If the marriage law were made as these women would have it, no man with any self respect would submit to it. The National Council of Women are the enemies of their sex, if the word sex can apply to them at all.

Perhaps after all, we had better take the advice these women give us, and sweep away the marriage laws altogether. Let us have no trouble also about divorce. Lot us give every woman the power to shake berself free from all marriago trammels whenever she likes. I suppose that even the women of the National Council, with their striving after equality, would not refuse the same privilege to "the more man." And then would come an era of freedom, a kind of sexual millennium or period of blessedness, a Paradise into which we would bo led by Mrs. Sievwright and her friends. A correspondent calls attention to the fact that this is a three tailors of Tooley-street affair, as the divisions show that sometimes not a dozen women are present. But then these are representative women, and meet in Christchurch aa delegates from the women of the colony.

At the Convention one evening there was what is knoivn as an interchange of "felino amenities" between Mrs. Tasker and Mrs. Hendre. It arose out of a discussion on technical education. Mrs. Hendre advocated that " parents should bring up boys and girls in the same way, teaching them the same things. When she was a girl she was taught to row a boat., ahoot, and do exactly what her brothers did. Whatever they could do, she could do." Mrs. Tasker (who, by the way, thinks that women weru formerly slaves, and are little better now) inquired if she might ask tho last speaker how many children she had of her own ? Thab is a query which generally puts a woman on bor mettle, and Mrs. Tasker l-Donr; for it takes a woman to know women, where to get a barb in between the joints of the armour. Mrs. Hendre was, however, equal to the occasion, and she replied that "she had one child." " Oh," said Mrs. Tasker, with polished irony, "excuse me asking, but I thought from the tone of your speech that you could not have had .my '." How these women love one another, to be sure! In this connection a good story is told of the late Vincent Pyke. A youthful remittance man, who was strong on blue blood, said to theDunstan philosopher, "I would have you know, Mr. Pyke, my father was a baron." When the fact was poured into his ear for the third time, with damnable iteration, Pyke turned—for even a worm will turn—and said, with a far-away look in his eye, " Is that so? well, then, I wish to heaven your mother had been a baron too."

I have just been reading how in Chicago ihere exists a company composed of select tbarpmen who manufacture evidence 'OI juries. An accused person has only to produce money—there must be no particular stint of that—and evidence will be forthcoming to produce his acquittal. An alibi is a favourite method of establishing innocence, and the details given show an immense ingenuity, and the still which long practice gives. This is not a mere newspaper sensation. It is a real society, existing in a civilised country forthedefeat of justice and the screening of wealthy criminals. But indeed in Auckland we should need no proot to convince Uβ of its possibility. We go about the business in a far more direct manner.

It is always interesting to meet with a new definition of the problem, when is a man drunk ? Policemen are naturally the great authorities, and indeed the thinking out of definitions on this point must be one of the elements which make the policeman s lot not a happy one. A very curious exhibition on this subject took place in an English police court lately. The defendant was represented by a solicitor, who asked the police sergeant " When do you think a man is drunk!" The answer was, " When he is inebriated," which does not make the matter much clearer than before. The next question was, as a matter of course, " When do you call him inebriated ?" And now came what is something like a definition, " When his brain is partly paralysort by the influence of intoxicating drink. This looks very precise and scientific, but after all practically ib cannot be of much use to a policeman. A man's brain may be "partly paralysed" and yet his legs may be quite capable of taking him home. But the policeman bit the important point. A man is drunk as his brain is affected.

The name of the piece of land at Corotnandel belonging to Mr. William Aitken, which was attempted to be taken from him in so unprincipled a manner, is Pukemaukuku, which being interpreted means Pigeon-snaring-hill. The syndicate of jumpers— whose names it would be interesting to have publiahed—thought they had caught a pigeon, and had nothing to do but to pluck it, bub they have found themselves mistaken. It is reported that a wellknown officer of tho House of Representatives, who has taken a prominent part in this matter, wrote the owner of the \?.M, only a few days before the Supreme Court judgment was given, offering on behalf of himself and the syndicate to share the land with him—that is, he offered to take only half of tho land from the owner of the whole.

I understand that Mr. Ben Tillebb was somewhat disgusted at his reception in Auckland in one respect. He expected to j meet at the Tailoresses , Hall the serried I: ranke uf Labour — thoughtful, studious £ workers engaged in solving the problems of a Labour.andstrivine to battlewith thewrong I that needs resistance, for the future in the ;•; ■distance, and the good that they can do. if Instead of this, tho Champion of Down&i' trodden Labour found himself face to face ' with the serried ranks of the fair tailoresse9, p ; who, judging from their fashionable attire, . were more concerned about the social dance v| ; 'which formed the finale of the reception, ithan the Labour problems. Mr. Tillett ,5 rbitterly remarked in his oration : .that the ■ peateet enemy of Labour was tlio work-ing-man himself! Hβ was given away |l»m by the chairman himself, though

quite innocently and unwittingly. When Mr. Tillett, in hie peroration, counselled that the flower of safety should be plucked by Labour oub of the nettle Capital, and that the one note of the hour should be

action—action—action. Mr. Fraser got up at its conclusion, and said a young lady would now sing the song, " Bide-a-wee," to enliven the meeting! Imagine Ben's feelings. His face was a picture gallery, and I do not wonder that he cleared out for Rotorua, and contemplates going back to Wellington overland. Mr. Fraser's ma! apropos remarks are in the category of what Punch terms, " Things Better left Unsaid."

But Mr. Fraaer, though a Caledonian, appears to have the Hibernian faculty of opening his mouth and putting his foot in it. In this connection a good story is told. He presided ab a gathering at which a Southern piper performed, and ho thus introduced him to the audience, " We aro now going to have a ' blaw o' the pipes' by a distinguished piper from Wellington, and I hope you will give him ft patknt hearing 1" The McGregor would have danced a wild fandango on his native heath, had it been passible, but as he was on a wooden platform, he simply put tho chanter under his oxter and forged ahead. Mr. Fraser errs in good company in pleading for a "patient hearing." Sydney Smith thought one might as well speak of playing on an iron foundry as of playing on the bagpipes, and Leigh Hunt's idea of martyrdom was to be tied to a stake within a hundred yards of a stout-lunged piper.

"The Only Staff Officer," to whom I referred in last) week's Uossip, addresses me " more in sorrow than anger" for having omitted in his biographical sketch to state particulars "about those medals"—African, Crimean, Indian, China, Turkish, and French. The French gave (our medals to each English regiment in the Crimea to bo awarded to four representative men, and my friend of H.M. 31st Foot was one of the quartette, i see sotno of Smith and Caughey's enterprising trnde rivals have been getting ac them for putting their establishment on a war footing, and Court a wider publicity for their establishment by issuingthefollowingbellicosobnlletin; "War in Crete ! But we can't keep 'a staff officer' at the expense of our customers." If they think that Smith andCaughey can't keep Sir Garnot Wolaeley No. 2—whon he has " got 'om all on," our own make—without sticking the ex's on to calicoes, they mako a big mistake. I don'D wonder that they are green with envy over the possession of " The Only Staff Officer," for you can't gob near that functionary on field days, and Field-Marshal Lord Roberts, or General Sir Evelyn Wood is not in it with him on the same asphalt!

An eye-witness tells me that it was a sight for tho gods to watch the way in which the managing director of tho Northern Union Steamboat Company—Mr. John Harrisonworked to raise the steamer Ethel after she had sunk at Mangawhare Wharf last Friday. On arriving at the sceno ho did nob commence by giving the men orders, but immediately stripped himself and took to the water, and gave an exhibition of expert diving seldom witnessed by bringing up himself the whole of the cargo, consisting of cases, sacks, etc., stored in theveesel'e hold, keeping tho winch of tho a.s. Wairoa constantly going, removing the goods as he brought them to the surface. Having so far lightened her he next dived under thu steamer's slern and passed

a sling through tho propeller aperture for tho purpose of lifting her. Altogether ho was thus employed [or ovor two hours, only coming to the surface for breathing purposes and with goods, during which timo lie constantly received tho plaudits of tho Mangawharian onlookore. I can hardly picture to myself the managing director of tho U.S.S. Company similarly occupied. Mr. Harrison at the finish was none the worse for his exploit, except being nearly blinded by contact with Wairoa mud the chief "element" of that river. ittaCUTIO.