LOCAL GOSSIP.

New Zealand Herald, Volume XXXIII, Issue 10223, 29 August 1896, Page 1 (Supplement)

LOCAL GOSSIP.

*s 1$ "Let me have alliance for a word or two." j —Shaltesper(, •■ The General Assembly has been at its beat this week, and has givon the Democracy a good 'object lesson' as to ' the first I assembly of gentlemen' in,tbe colony. Just j before the French Revolution of 1848 a Parisian ouvricr said to his fellow, during an altercation, ' You may call me anything bat a Peer of France.' Will the time over come ill this country when a workman will say,' You may call me anything but a member of Parliament.' Perhaps it is too exacting to makes whole body of men responsible for the vagaries of some of their numbor, but it is the way of the world, and so much the more reason why the standard of political character should be raised a niche higher. There is no doubb that the real blame lies with the people themselves, who by their lack of intelligent interest in public affairs allow somo men to secure a seat in Parliament who, if Dame Rumour is to be believed, are not fit to run an apple stall, and who would not be chosen as referees in a dog fight.

Last Saturday I referred to the benighted condition of affairs in the public office of the Auckland Telegraph department, and showed that visitors there were, owing to the defective lighting arrangements, simply groping after the Truth. I even drew an affecting picture of the solitary 'dip' in the empty bottle (Bulldog) which was used to supplement the gaslight. As showing the benefit of a little 'gassing' in the papers, and its effect upon the Ministerial mind, on visiting the public office this week,' I was startled to find that the public offices wore simply radiant with light, and oven the half-dazed counter clerk exclaimed, like Bartitceus of old, ' whereas I was hlind now I see.' Can it be that Ring Richard said, 'Let there be light,' and there was light ? It appears that all that was necessary to do was to blow out the mains, but it the Cimmerian darkness had not been ' blown upon,' the officers, it may be, would have gone on •working in the semi-darkness till the Day of Judgment. It has been explained to me that the hitch arose all along of their not being an 'official utterance.' Great is the Circumlocution Department unci its mysteries past finding out.

The Women's Democratic Union, if it is anything, is always protesting against, eomotbing or other. This week the Union, while thanking Mr. Seddon for his Bill re juvenile immorality, protests against the police Laving power to arrest any girl, and suggests that' women be appointed for that purpose, with power to call on the police if necessary.' I can only hope that some of the members of the Democratic Union may be appointed to the job. On one occasion I saw a fair creature— of the ' sad Priestesses of Humanity,' as Lecky terms them — being arrested. Notwithstanding the use of ahand stretcher, on which she was strapped down, hands and feet, it £ook seven policemen to take her to the lock-up. Her miscellaneous references to the parentage (on the maternal side) of the constables was more emphatic than polite, and she performed the mysterious operation, regarding the materfamiliases, technically known as 'calling thorn out of their name,' while from her treasury of vituperative phraseology she drew forth things both old and new, and painted the guard-room generally with a vermillion hue. I fancy thab even Mrs. Collings or Mrs. Daisy Chapman, would think it too large an order to tackle a nymph of that type, and would fall back upon ' a tnimbah av the foorce!' without the slightest hesitation.

It has been said that if a man aim at the moon he may possibly hit a haystack. The City Council is so much taken up with big ichemes that it ha? no time or attention for the'humdrum duties of ordinary civic life. A very good illustration of that is now before the public; lb has been worrying over a £40,000 public reserve in Freeman's Bay (which will be large enough to admit of two football teams playing at once), yet at the same time it has ' hung up' a scheme involving only £1500 for providing a Fire Brigade station and rendering efficient the means for protecting life and property, The meed of approval of old was to those who were faithful in that which is least, bat) the City Council is not built that way.

Some of the head teachers of th. ■ ity schools, in pleading with the City Schools Committee to make Wednesday a two o'clock holiday, re the Auckland-Taranaki footbSll match, owing to the fact that the match would put a drain upon the attendance, showed a good deal of pawkiness. They were putting in one word for the boys and two for themselves. There is a tradition that the city schools narrowly escaped having a holiday when 'the dogs and monkeys' came to town. If all the ingenious pleas for holidays (in addition to the Saturday holday) are granted, I expect to see the day when the scholars will get a holiday on the strength of the head tocher's baby nutting it*, first tooth. As showing what things are coming to in the football craze, I am credibly informed that on® young man popped the question to a young lady on the road back from Potter's Paddock, after the Auckland Wellington football match. She declined to give him a decisive answer till she had ascertained for which team he was barracking!

The New Woman has been much in evidence during the past week, on the bicycle. Notwithstanding all tho contempt for the ' horrid male creature'expressed, and that ill she wants is to have a fair field and no favour, I notice that she never appears ibroad on wheels without having something of the male persuasion as a cavalier or guardian. It appears that man is of some use after all, if only to act as attendant upon the New Woman when she cycles.

The presentation of s, pulpit gown to the Rev. K. F. Macnicol at a church reunion this week was not without its humorous aspects. The ladies who subscribed for its presentation intended to-effect a surprise, but the secret had oozed out, as might have been expected, and reached the ears of a colleague of the rev. gentleman, who gave the show aw*v. It was fortunate for the ministerial purveyor of up-to-date news that he got away quietly at the end of the meeting before the ladies could get at his back hair. Mr. Macnicol, on seeing the new gown, put himself inside it in the quickest time on record, being deftly helped in robing by the lady who presented it. The rev. gentleman had a good deal to Bay about his old gown as well as about the now. He stated that it had got so threadbare that iie was almost inclined to discard if the change would not have been noticed, bub on reflection he resolved Ito stick to the old gown as long as it would stick to him.' Mr. Macnicol' expressed the hope that his people would not regard the gown as a ' vestment' or a piece of man millinery, for he believed that on an emergency he could preach a sermon as well without it as with it. It was pleasing to see tho good feeling expressed to the old pastor of St. James's, and he can say as was said by Curran, though under very different) circumstances, ' they may take tho gown, but they cannot take the stuff.

During tho week a member of the Society of Friends, Mr. Joseph Neave, in a lecture at) the Y.M.C.A., threw some light upon the character oi that' organised hypocrisy the Russian Government, which poses as the apostle of religious freedom in Bulgaria, Armenia, and Crete, yet exiled to the Caucausus inoffensive people, like the Stundists, because they would not become members of the Greek Church. Mr. Neave said that there was no hope of any cessation in this bitter persecution until Pobedonostyzoff, procurator of the Holy Synod, was either converted or 'removed.' Per« haps tho most effective measure would be to ask Providence to ' remove 1 this Holy functionary.

Some time ago inquiries wore forwarded .to me, concerning the brothers Norman, one fa whom fell at the outset of the Waikato

campaign in the engagement of Bald Hill of 1863-64. Thanks to the courtesy of several correspondents, I was able to secure for the relatives in England the information required. The following letter in regard to the matter explains itself, as showing the value of press publicity

To ' Mercutio,'—l have received a nice letter from Mrs. Shield, England, in answer to one I wrote her regarding information she was seeking through Mr. Seffern.of Tmauaki, and published in your notes re the Brothers Norman, one of whom was killed at the Bald Hill fight with the natives in October, 1863. I had much pleasure in being able to supply her with the information she was asking for. This again shows the great value of the New Zealand Herald and Weekly News, for through the columns of these papers what was wanted in England was supplied.—H. Ckispe, Stanlake, Mauku. Mekcutio.