WHY HE DIDN'T MARRY.

New Zealand Herald, Volume XXV, Issue 9130, 11 August 1888, Page 2 (Supplement)

WHY HE DIDN'T MARRY.

A BACHELOR TELLS WHY HE REMAINED SINGLE.

" Why* didn't I marry?" repeated a bright, young-old bachelor the other day, as he knocked the ashes from his cigar in a contemplative manner, and then looked quizzically at his questioner. " There are several reasons. I have the best cooking from the kitchens of all my friends ; I see the wives of all in their prettiest gowns and with their brightest smiles ; the babies, if they are teething, are kept in the nursery. Then, if I don't feel in good humour, I can always go to some public place for my breakfast and quarrel with a waiter instead of a wife. Fifty cents will cheer the former at any time, whereas I have known it to cost a thousand times that sum to bring one of the latter out of a single tit of the mopes. You know Jack ? Yes, I thought so. He and I were great chums before his marriage, eighteen months ago, and I've seen a good deal of him since. He lives in the block where I have quarters. During the first six months of his married life his wife always watched for him and tripped down the street half a block to meet him, when he left the car ; for three months more she met him at the gate ; then for six months she opened the front door for him and I kitow always kissed him when lie came in. Last week I went home with him to dinner and we found her reading a novel in the library. I don't believe she would have left her chair if he had been alone. Does he care '! Bless you, no ! He has cooled off, too, and yet they get along well, and I don't think they have yet had any serious quarrels. They give good dinners, too." — Detroit Free ress.