JOSH BILLINGS PHILOSOPHY.

New Zealand Herald, Volume XXII, Issue 7341, 30 May 1885, Page 2 (Supplement)

JOSH BILLINGS PHILOSOPHY.

It iz the average that wins io all the moral az well az temporal matters. The m&n who iz pioua to-day and impious to-morrow, ain't so good a man as the one who is moderately wicked all the time.

I took upon a thoroughly bizzness woman with a species ov respekt, mingled with wonder; but I couldn't luv one enny more than I could a buzz saw in motion.

To me thare ain't a more noble sight than a man toiling honestly for biz daily bread. Wit and humor are the seasoning of every day life, az salt and pepper are ov every day food.

Experience teaches mutch, but learns us little. We are such vain phools, that we are ever tricing to beat even our experiences. Courage iz put up in small packages, both amung animals and men. A dwarf iz allwuss reddy to fite twice hiz size, and two little men are more than a match for a henhawk.

Thare iz a kind ov ekonemy that iz all grab and no grip; this kind keeps a man mean and poor all hiz life. Sum men are ruled bi their reazon, sum bi the reason ov others, but most of them bi their prejudices. , Wisdom makea a man humble, while learning makes him vain; the wize man iz surprized that; he knows so little, the learned one that he knows so mutch.

Kindness iz a golden thread that runs thru tho warp ov every man's existence, aumtimes hid from sight, but never entirely lost.

If the little fnsekts even only knu their power for evil, they could make our existence miserable.

■ The grate errcr that menny metaphysician make, they are trieing to fly into Heaven instead ov creeping thare; their wings will melt off long before they git haff way thru their journey. . • Sad ess hides a multitude ov blunders.

It iz impossible for a man ov large brains to be a bigot; hiz brains are continually gitt* ing outside ov hia kreed.