JOSH BILLINGS PHILOSOPHY.

New Zealand Herald, Volume XXII, Issue 7270, 7 March 1885, Page 2 (Supplement)

JOSH BILLINGS PHILOSOPHY.

If we were allwus in lack, we should soon question our mortality. Philosophy is the studdy of human nature —ourselfs first and our nabors afterward. A pedant is a learned fool. The riter who can put all there iz to be said on & subject in one line iz infinitely a better man than the one who can pat is in four. Maxims were made for others to follow, not us. The man who profits by his own experience realizes a hundred cents on every dollar invested, but he who profits by the experience of others, just twice as much. Gentlemen are born so ; those who have made themteifa so, if they ever fall among loafers, soon git down to their level. Wit surprises us, humour pleases ; either of them are good sauce for wisdom. Everyone seems to think he iz a good critic, and he iz, just so long as he criticizes himself. If we won't be'eave only what we can prove, even an oyster oa the half-shell iz a failure. What the world seems to want the most now iz less creed and more credentials, less talk and more turkey, less culture and more charity. We owe all our success to our necessitys. Nature creates genius, and educates it, too. The devil iz always ready to compromise : if he can't get a foot, he will take an ijch— he beleaves he can compromise for the other eleren inches at his leisure. Nature has made each thins; perfect after its own kind, but the very learned are trieing to cross the man, monkey, and crawfish together, and if they ever 6ucce«d they will tind they have got a second-rate "'*" and monkey, and a cussid poor crawfish. All success begins at the bottom, and mounts the ladder a round at a time.