IT IS TOWN TALK

Free Lance, Volume X, Issue 499, 22 January 1910, Page 22

IT IS TOWN TALK

That a new book is, announced; entitled. "The Blot." Someone appears to have been slinging ink. , , — That Finance Minister Sir Joseph Ward is prophesying very prostimes ahead, and he's not merely guessing. —That an article, has just appeared in a ; contemporary, entitled, "Are Women Cruel?" It will probably be followed by one entitled, "Is Man • Kind?" —-Thaty considering the # w.ay ] the English suffragettes are bending everybody across their knees, it is time one prominent young lady called herself Miss Span/khiirst. *—-That the new year, isn't showing any improvement in the tally of shipping disasters near and far. Old Father Neptune is "sweating" his minions surely. —That Dr. McArthur has just about finished packing his trunks to go Home, and the Monday morning toper® .at the city Court look genuinely sorry at his departure. —That a class of ihistruction in the treatment of the apparently drowned is beings opened in Wellington. Is this in view. of the 'possibility-, of a total prohibition! vote in the-city at'/ the'next election? —That sly-grcggingseems painfully persistent in Maoriland. The papers are constantly reporting the arrest of "groggens" in every part of the colony. And.'it generally requires a few lorries to: carry away the police hauls, j —That no time was lost, in gazetting the dismissal of Captain Frank Berners Knyvett. The Government-"Ga-zette" of January 13th contained the official pleasure of the Governor on the "■ dismissal, though the court-martial had only been- held a little over a week previously.

—--That Mr.'. Speaker Guinness :s a candidate for the tallest trout yarn from Rotorua this season. —That the report that ; Colonel Robin is .going to spend a short holiday in Auckland lacks confirmatiom up to the present. -—That: Alf.. Hill is back in ■ town again, /receiving hits friend's congratulations and getting ready a Kitchener ode, or- something like it. -—That the .recent howling tpurn.ament. and the British elections are the only affairs of life 'being discussed in Wellington on '.Monday last. . .- . —That Lord Kitchener is not likely to interfere in the Knyvett case, but an expression of opinion an the matter from him would make, good reading. '.'■'■■■ —That no one was surprised when Captain Newtown, of the' ill-fated . "Waikare." receieved his certificate with flattering ■ expressions of commendation. > ' ; —That the advent of Anglican, parsons into the community for their Synod is having a marked effect on the weather. Rain has set in this week. Is it because they are so dry? —That, by the .Auckland indications over the Knyvett case, it looks as if His Excellency may "shortly "be pleased to express his pleasure on the ■re-in'statement of Captain Knyvett."- : —That the doctors and dentists get a great hearing in the January Government ."Gazette."..... By the way, quite a number of Armstrongs have qualified as dentists—a natural vocation... ; ••'.■■■',' . ' . ' —That Dick Arnst appears to be having as much, bother as .ever in ,gettiaig . what he calls a satisfactory deal for the "championship." Dick will be called the £ : s. d. sculling champion if he isn't careful. ■ '." the extensive jam-labelling regulations contained in the latest issue of the Government "Gazette" have no reference to spreading: on the jam thickly when making complimentary speeches. Will Tommy Taylor please note?, : —That so faa- we have heard nothing of a. bowlers J testimonial. to the Rev. P. 0.. Bates for the weather last week. Arid he kept the -tap turned off until Monday mid-day, too!, In fact, Bates?is week bates, all ' Wellington bowling records; yr .

—That a weill-known Wellington gentleman has given up playing bridge. He says the game wasn't worth the scandal. —That the Australian "cattle king,/' Mr. Sidney Kidman, is atbout to -visit New Zealand. Does J. Ilbtt,: jun., feel interested? -—That Wanganui ; appears to have taken properly to the ; ' water now. Its scullers . carried matter® as they V.bsd at the regatta last. Saturday. —That a land transfer executed in a Maiuawatu Cooirt last week was that'from "Whisker to Beard." Quite .a hairy so.rt of-.transaction.. —-That we are safe' from the vegetarian diet after all. The settlement of the slaughtermen's _ .strike. has ensured the accustomed 'join* for our tahles. .. • ■. —That the "chain letter" ' cranks are once again on the job in Wellington, and the sensible public acre asked to jump on the silly business with both •. feet.; -..'.-• ; . ; ■ * —That the prices obtained • at the recent wool sales were enough to give the producers enlarged heart troubles. At any rate, they have boomed the Dominion again. —That the annual report of . the Wellington Harbour Board is enough to make even Auckland turn sick with envy.; Wellington Harbour matters appear to know nothing of slump. —That the-W?lK^^o nmu ' s i |C, aO. ; and dramatic competitions are practically ■ an accomplished fact noiw, and we are likely to have any amount of entertainment at the game this year. —That the Hon. J. A. Millar has managed to effect a saving of £70,000 on. the working of our railways, and he's but after further ..savings. J. A. M. reckonis that sum is worth, all the growling he's put up (with. —-That some mathematical bowler has figured out to 400 ton© of bowling power laid on the grass in Wellington during the necenrt tournament. ' mathematician ought to be fuirmished with a job in out finance; department. ■.'■/■'-' ■ ..' '.:■■ . '.' ' . ■, —That Sir Joseph Ward's appearance two days .following on the Wellington green. looked, like a fo(r the- ancient .game of bowls. Perhaps, the bowling, members of the net are him l to qualify as skip of the Ministerial; team.

—That, according to a report in an. ■up-country paper, a man was arrestedlast Friday in a pig-sty©. Pork creature! —That 1910 promises to be a long— looked-for year of "peace and plenty" for our farmers, agriculturists * and pastoralists ' alike. —That Wellington has resumed its. usual sober aspect now that the landscape no longer howls with the loud blazers of the bow'leirs. —That so far this season fourteen footballers have been killed in matches in America. Locks as if football in America is a dying game. —That the Hon. Tom Mackenziehas not yet finished reading his telegrams and letters of congratulation on- his elevation to full Cabinet rank. * —That the Seventh Day Adventurers, who are in camp at Christohurch, rise at 5.30 a.m.. and retire, to silence at 10 p.m. And yet some people wantto bring in a daylight saving bill. —That none of the. shopmen -in .Wellington ~ seem sure of the Anniversary Day holiday. The annual instance of' m/uddledom surviyes with distressing persistency. — -That the Government has one© again gazetted its offer of threepence per gallon bonus on the first five, hutnw dred thousand gallons of mineral oil produced in the 'Dominion. "Who is . going to lift it? —That, acoordinfg to. the "Times," the Tory and Unionist combination have no hope in the British elections, and. according to-thie "Dominion," the Liberals are cooked. "You pays youT'penmy and you takes your ollOlce. , ' —That Thorndon residents are growing jealous of Lyall Bay over the regular band recitals at the new seaside rendezvous. If the Thorndon people lived up Cuba-street way they would pray for relief from the band nuisance. —That the presence of half-a-dozen 'bishops and many scores of parsons in Wellington next Sunday ought to make the Empine City the most holy city in the Antipodes. And yet, the chances are that Sergeant R-utledge will -make his axxmstomed haul of sly-grog.