A Drastic Remedy.

Free Lance, Volume III, Issue 147, 25 April 1903, Page 12

A Drastic Remedy.

HES wife had acquired the habit ot going at night when he slept to wheie his trousers hung, and taking, money irom their pockets, but m tins instance it is the consequences* that aie interesting. He is the proprietoi ot a business that brings him a large income Theic are rush hours 111 hib business, and at such times much bad mono) finds its way to his coffers. In the com so ot a yeai, usually, he gatheis a large bundle of counterfeit notes of laige and small denominations. Ho \\ as thinking one day of some plan to bieak his wife of her nocturnal boiiowing While he was studying out the plan he thought alsoi of the- bundle of bad notes then m his safe. He never knew just vi iiy he was keeping the bad money until that moment. "That's a brighter idea than I have had for yeais," he said, and he smiled with satisfaction that evening as he filled three of his pockets with the counterfeits He took no other sort of money, except sixpence for car fares. He couldn't go to sleep that night, and could hairdlv keep from chuckling with mirth. He managed, however, to simulate sleep, and, out of a corner of his eye, saw his loving helpmeet help herself to the notes. She took some from each of the three rolls, thinking he wouldn't miss them. The next morning he hurried off to his office so that his w lfe wouldn't get time to repent, and tell him what she had done Several time* that day he went to the window and looked out Hist to be alone with his thoughts and be happy. A telephone message came for him in the afternoon It was fiom a> big office in the city. ''Hello. Are you married?" came the question over the telephone. "Yes. Is that any of your business 5 " "It may be. There's a woman over here who says she's your wife." "Well, what of it?" "You'd better come over and see." He hurried to the office, doubting and agitated. His wife had been shopping. She bought things so liberally that the salesman, who served her was delighted. The bill of goods amounted to £5 10s, and it was for trinkets only, such as women buy who have lots of money. She handed over six £1 notes. She waited for her change. The salesman returned, but he was not smiling suavely "I'm sorry, madam, but these notes are bad " "Bad p " And, with a long, cold, withering look, she gathered up the notes, and handed over some "good" ones. After another wait, the salesman came back, and he was not smiling then either. "I'm sorry to inform you, madam, that these notes are bad also." She started to say something; to him, but lust at that moment the right words were too hard to find But she could still look chilling dances at him She slowly picked up the two returned notes and stuffed them into the off-side of heir purse. Her fingers were not movine: deftly, but she managed to draw out a £10 note. With icy deliberation she passed it over the counter "See if tha,t is bad, too," she said, with fine irony She was breathing hard but otherwise she was perfectly calm while she waited Soon the salesman came back His face was in hard, set lines. "It is," he said with an effort. "Give me that money, vou — you wretch." "I'm sorry, madam, but " * * • The overworked salesman was saved the labour of finishing such a difficult sentence. A house detective stepped up beside her, and finished it for him by telling her she would have to come to the manager's office. He was a police officer and she avoided a scene bv going with him. Her husband settled the matter by telling the superintendent the whole story, and payine; the bill with cood golden sovereigns