You and Your Child

Nelson Evening Mail, Volume LXXII, 31 January 1939, Page 2

You and Your Child

TRY TO CURB CHILD’S FEELINGS OF HATE (By Jane Herbert Goward) “Take your friends to your own stoop, Tommy. I don’t want you here. If you come here again, I shall tell your mother." Tommy eyed the woman contemptuously. She always chased him away and he always came back—he liked to irritate her. And as usual he took his time about leaving while she continued to scold. Later, when she went to complain, Tommy felt confident his mother would defend him. His trust was not misplaced. The woman and his mother parted, sworn enemies. Every community has its disagreeable people, and feuds between them and the children of the neighbourhood always exist. Parents, however, should keep out of these hostilities, refusing to side with either faction.

The best way to handle the complainant in the case is to thank him for calling the matter to your attention, assure him that you will do the best you can to correct the child and let him go home satisfied. And if the child should overhear this, you may rest assured his antagonistic impulses will at least not be further aroused. Also, don’t at this time attempt either to preach, punish or scold the child. An appeal, rather, should be made that will arouse peace-loving tendencies in him. A wise parent might say in an offhand way: “If anyone didn’t want me around, I’d have more pride than to go there. Mrs Smith, I understand, does not want you to play on her stoop, so why annoy her? When you upset her, she comes over here and upsets me. 1 1 don’t like to get complaints about you. Please stay away from her I place, Tommy."