LANGUAGE IN GOLF
EXERCISE OF DISCIPLINE
(By finny Vardon, Six Times Open
Champion)
II is something of ii tradition that golf is ;i game which moves its devotees to more or less frcnont outbursts of unparliamentary language I read somewhere Llm ulhcr day of its "sulphurous trail." In pretty much the same way people aecepl angling ;|S ;l pastime which oxcit.es its followers to oxaggoralo tho magni 1 inlt> of their catches. It. is not much use protesting agaist these judgments. I did, indeed, know ;i clergyman, ;i golfer of long and varied experience, who said; "Ours is a game that the lay mind cannot understand. Mild expletives are su excusable that I believe they are not even set. down by the Recording Angel." After that, it would be superfluous to argue on the subject. Far better were it to remember that ho emphasised tho word "mild."
To lie sure, there may be differences of opinion as li< where mildness of language ends. II is also a point, for discussion whether Ihe thinking of an imprecation is as bad as the saying of it. There is. for instance, the old story of the golfer who every time be made :i bad shot exclaimed: "Assouan!" and. on being asked what it meant, explained that Assouan was the biggest dam in the world. Ought he to be held guilty? Personally, I have not the slightest doubt that golf ought to be played in tho spirit of perfect complacency which always marked the attitude of Lord Balfour towards the game. Despite his immense zest for golf (a keenness that impelled him at the outset to spend months practising it without engaging anybody in rivalry), there is unanimity among those who opposed Lord Balbaur in subsequent years that, no matter how great the provocation of a missed shot, he never said anything stronger than "Bother I" —and then only after profound meditation.
POETS IN ADVERSITY
Even are there players who, while invoking the most evil consequences to be visited upon a golf ball that thwarts their desire, do it in a manner so suave as to be almost poetic and picturesue. There is a colonel of this kind, an excellent player who sometimes represents his club in big events. The greatest compliment ever paid to him was by a lady golfer, a district visitor highly esteemed for her constant work on behalf of a dozen different charitable causes. "I always like to follow him when be is taking part in a tournament," she said ; • not to watch him. but to boar him." There is ample evidence to show, however, that the very nature of golf exercises slowly and surely a disciplinary effect upon the human tendency towards invective when things go wrong. Sooner Of later, almost everybody learns that the only frame of mind which succeeds in this pastime is one that remains tranquil in trying situations. There are sonic illustrious' proofs of the fact, and none more distinguished than that of Mr Bobby Jones, who once bad a bent for hurling away a club with which he had failed at a shot, and who, in his book, has expressed penitence for ceasing to try seriously in the British open championship of 1921 when be struck a patch of adversity. A man who could conquer his temperament as Mr Jones has done, and swing as he docs, would indeed conquer the world. It is to be feared that there is too ready a disposition to believe that golfers are in the habit of saying things on the links that they would not like to have reported in their public speeches. Some time ago, the Kendal magistrates heard the case of a boy of sixteen who was charged with using obscene language while "playing golf on' public ground adjoining the Kendal course. In his defence ho said : "Golfers should set an example. You should hear them when they miss the ball. You would know if you had boon a caddie. But there is nothing said about that." The chief constable remarked that no doubt golfers could "rise to the occasion when required," but that when, as in this case, offensive language was shouted about the place on a Sunday afternoon, it was very unpleasant for men who were, in the company of ladies within earshot. He might have added that it was equally unpleasant for ladies who were in tho company of men. At any rate, the bench were evidently satisfied that it was not entirely the fault of older golfers that the boy had grown up to express himself so freely when pursuing the game. They fined him ten shillings.
TAMING THE MIGHTY
At the same time, this seems to be a very reasonable price to charge for the liberty taken. It suggests that, even in magisterial circles, the uttering of ribald words by a person who finds himself exasperated by the waywardness of a miserable little golf ball is not deemed so heinous an offence as similar fluency of speech in other walks of life. No doubt there are a great many men, possessed of supreme command over their feelings and diction in business, whose early efforts to master golf incite the most spontaneous and complete expressions of their indignation with it. Perhaps it is that golf is so much more difficult than business, at which they are all-conquering. They are so unaccustomed to being humbled that they cannot understand how a mere game comes to make them look futile, especially as they have paid a professional to lot them into ihe secret of accurate hitting. But they soon realise that mere, wrath makes their golf worse than over, their opponents secretly exultant, and their caddies bard pressed to suppress open sniggers. Thus does their better nature assert itself—because complaisance and control are essentials to success.
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Bibliographic details
Nelson Evening Mail, Volume LXIV, 24 March 1930, Page 8
Word Count
973LANGUAGE IN GOLF Nelson Evening Mail, Volume LXIV, 24 March 1930, Page 8
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