HUMOUR

Manawatu Times, Volume 63, Issue 184, 6 August 1938, Page 11

HUMOUR

Canny There had been a head-on car collision and both drivers were waiting for the police to take particulars. Sandy offered MacTavish, with whom he had collided, his flask. “Have a drappie,** he said. After.MacTavish had had several, he remarked to Sandy: “It's nearly al? gone. Why don’t you have a drappie yourself ?** “No fear, mon, n said Sandy; “not until the policeman’s been.”

Mother: “Then tell the moon to take its bike for it’s time you were in bed. ’ *

Proving It!

A league for the protection of henpecked husbands was formed in a small Kansas town, and at the first meeting a man named George was elected president. George had just taken the chair and banged the table for order vphen a tall, gaunt, stem-looking woman burst into the hall, rushed at George and seized him by the collar. 4 4 You come home!" she shouted, shaking him. 4 4 What business have you in a place like this? You’re not henpecked! ”

Any Excuse— One day a neighbour came over and wanted to borrow Grandpa’s new rope. Said Grandpa: “No, I’ve got to use that rope to-day to tie up some sand.’’ After the neighbour had left a friend said: “Grandpa, you know you can’t tie sand with a rope!** “Remember, my boy,** replied the old man, 4 4 you can do pretty near anything with a piece of rope if you don’t wan? to lend it.’*

Saved! The chief of the village fire brigade was making his report to the chairman of the village council. “Yes, sir,** he said, proudly, 44 we put out tho fire just ten minutes after we got there.** “Very praiseworthy,*’ said the chairman. 4 4 Had it got a good start of you f * * 44 1 should say it had,** said the fire chief. 4 4 When we got there only the foundation was standing.**

Testimonial “ What do you think of my work with the camera?** asked the young man, an enthusiastic amateur photographer. 44 It*s splendid in its way,** replied the girl. 4 ‘lt’s better than any of the professional caricaturists could do, I’m sure."