HOME TRUTHS.

Manawatu Times, Volume LXV, Issue 656, 4 March 1909, Page 3

HOME TRUTHS.

THE BORE IN THE HOME.

In every home there is a bore,

A bore is a person who inclines one to drowsiness. At times, a bore may arouse nausea—so disgusting is the tedium of his .boredom, the prosiness, the du.lness, the dryness, tha flatness; so slowly do the stories of the bore drag along their weary length. But the chief characteristic of the bore is tills—he harps for ever on the one string. Perhaps the commonest type of the masculine gender is the husband who is never tired of telling liis wife about the stupidity of his chief at the offlee—or of the foreman of the works—or the man who is his partner or his assistant. Equally common in the feminine gender is th« wife bore who is always talking about the thousand and one little thorns in the path of the housekeeper. These bores do more than all others combined to undermine the happiness of the home.

The crank bore is another great nuisance, Perhaps he is a vegetarian, and makes his wife's life miserable by insisting that he knows better how to feed the baby than does the baby's mother. This is a diflicult bore to deal with—but an Act of Parliament giving mothers sole control of their childrens' diet until five years old might be useful, The meal bores are a very harmful variety. There is the bore who reads the newspaper at breakfast; the bore who discusses his food by words as well as with his teeth; the bore who insists on having out-of-the-way dishes, such as baked potatoes at tea-time; the bore who takes 250 bites to each mouthful; and, among many others, there are those bores who will not talk while they are eating, and will not attempt to be pleasant until they are well fed. Political bores break up many happy homes. Whatever their faith—whether Free Trade or Tariff Reform, whether the Big Navy or Little Englandism—on every subject that is brought up they must needs turn the hose of their enthusiasm.

Should the baby cry because she has broken her doll—that "would never have happened, says the political bore, if we had Protection. Docs the dog kill the neighbor's cal>-such a thing would have been impossible if the House of Lords were abolished. Does the wife want a new dress—Socialism is the true remedy, Does the husband wish to attend a racemeeting the need of "Votes foi Women" is obvious at onco.

Perhaps the most nauseating typo is the humorous bore. The brain of this type consists of little but old Punch jokes. It is really unfortunate for the human race that so few people caa be humorous without being bores. Your bore, unfortunately, never knows that he is a bore. Thus, the man whose one idea of conversation is to contradict whatever is said to him always imagines that he is a charming talker. So the woman who interrupts firmly believes she is the Queen of good listeners. It is, therefore, very difficult to treat the bore. For nothing can be done until the bore realises his boredom,

The only remedy would be for every one of ivs to say now and again, turning a searchlight on to the innermost soul, "Self, are you a bore?" An impertinent question—but worth considering.—Pearson's Weekly.