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JUDICIAL WIT.

The gibes and flashes of merriment by which magistrates are wont to " set the the table in a roar," are usually invested with humor only from the exigencies of the occasion. Who would act so unseemly as not to laugh at a joke from the Bench? When Mr. Nupkins, the Mayor of Ipswich, remarked that, Pickwick was " a very good name for the Newgate calendar"—" this was a joke; to Mr. Jinks, Mr. Gummer, and all the specials went into convulsions.'-* The town of Musselburgh, Scotland, however, is favored with a singular genial magistrate of a dry humor that it is impossible not to appreciate; and his fortnightly sittings are quite pleasant little reunions. On one occasion recently .hie was. in a perfect flow of and delighted everyone except perhaps the offenders. A woman named Shiels, who is a notorious scold, being charged with annoying her neighbors, Bailie Brown inquired, if her husband were alive. When answered in the affirmative, he held up his hand and ejaculated, "Weel I pity him ?" In imposing a small fine on another old offender the bailie remarked apologetically, " The prisoner is ower auld for me to try admonition wi." A young man was charged with creating a disturbance, having' urged on his behalf that he had himself been " pitched out of a public-house," the bailie retorted, ""Yes, and then got yoursel' pitched into the police-office.- Weel, just pitch doon 7s. 6d." A big hulking fellow was next charged with being disorderly. " Are ye a stranger, man ?" inquired the bailie. " Na, bailie," replied the prisoner. '' Well," observed the bailie, "Ye micht hae been better bred than Btan* there wi* her hawns in yer pooches ; tak' them oot, ye lazy fellow." This homely style of dispensing justice was, it is stated, evidently apppeciated by a large and admiring audience. It must be quite refreshing to get through the Police Conrt duty in this way, and we recommend the bailie's example to some of our own justices.

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Permanent link to this item

https://paperspast.natlib.govt.nz/newspapers/MIC18760121.2.17

Bibliographic details

Mount Ida Chronicle, Volume VI, Issue 359, 21 January 1876, Page 3

Word Count
332

JUDICIAL WIT. Mount Ida Chronicle, Volume VI, Issue 359, 21 January 1876, Page 3

JUDICIAL WIT. Mount Ida Chronicle, Volume VI, Issue 359, 21 January 1876, Page 3