With the Muse.

Mataura Ensign, Issue 214, 12 November 1896, Page 3

With the Muse.

» A SONG OF THE HOUE. (Air— The Buckinghamshire Dragoon.) He longed for a sign of his whisker, He'd just begun learning to smoko, He was bent upon being a frisker, And thought life a jolly good joke His eyelashes bad a soft droop-droop, He ogled the ladies, of course, For he was a dashing young troop-troop— Trooper of Fife Light Horse. He neglected the breeding of cattle In the far north, near old Aberdeen, To acquire the bold arts of the battle, And do a week's drill for the Queen. He sat with an elegant stoop-stoop On the biggest-boned steed in tho force, And his eye had the flash of a troop-troop — Trooper of Eife Light Horse. His helmet was bright as a door-hell, And white as the snow was his plume, His stirrups were jingling, and cleaned well By his close-shaven, bandy-legged groom. His bridle chains hung in a loop-loop. H is sword dangled loosely, oi course, And he carried the gun of a troop-troop — Trooper of Fife Light Horse, He went to a very gay dinner, Where Gienlivet was frequent and free, And being a raw young beginner, He was soon very far on the spree. He laid ail the blame on the soup-soup, Declaring " he'd never been worse," And he swore at the beer like a troop-troop— Trooper of Fife Light Horse. But the speech he attempted to utter Slipped clean off the edge of his tongue : Going home he sat down in the gutter. And there very loudly be sung. Two men from afar heard his whoop-whoop — They belonged to the blue-coated force — And they said " here's a very tight troop-troop " Trooper of Fife Light Horse. His struggles and wild language scorning, These constables bore him to bed, Whence he rose rather late the nest morning With a horrible pain in bis head. As to fix on his spurs he did stoop-stoop, I He condemned in a tone that was coarse The morning parade of a troop-troop — Trooper of Fife Light Horso. A moral belongs to this story Which all gay young fellows should heed, When they set out to gallop to glory i On the back of a meddlesome steed : Never take too much drink at a swoop-swoop, Or a headache jou'll have— maybe worse ; But be a most temperate troop-troop— Trooper of Fife Light Horse. 1.D.1 O.T. TAKEN ABACK. A Highland laird, suddenly taken ill, sent for a . famous physician from * Edinburgh. When the consultation 1 was over, the laird slipped live pounds into the professor's hand. " Sir," said ' tbe physician, "lam not in the habit ' of disputing my fee ; at the same time 3 I cannot help pointing out that what 3 you have given me is much less than I , am accustomed to. Had I remained in Edinburgh, I could in an hour have 3 made three times as much as you have given me." "Is that so ?" said the laird. "Is that so? Well the quicker x you are back in Edinburgh the better." A DIABOLICAL SHELL. i Some of our latest field-guns are to s be sent out to Egypt, and tested for the first time in actual warfare. These l guns, it is said, will carry a shell JO t miles, each shell from its highly r explosive character being calculated 3 to kill or disable 200 men if it falls 1 into a compact body of the enemy. ' The guns, too, are such quick-firers t that before the first shell expodes three ' more will be following it through the ) air. ; Bodies of men buried in Siberia two hundred years ago were examined , recently, and found unchanged, being ' frozen perfectly solid.