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Mataura Ensign, Volume 7, Issue 368, 24 June 1884, Page 2

Talking abont missions reminds mo of the Gospel Temperance Mission, -vfliicJi held a week of meetings in InvorcargiU lately. I could not help asking, vnl hutio ? Why should a lot of rev. and other gentlemen strain their throats for a whole wrcolcP There seems to be for some minds a peculiar fascination in. a " week of service's." 4- ' temperance society j that expects us," ljke Armyj to be at "r.ts 1 meetings every night is itself intemperate. I suppose ire shall havo a week of politics next. Besides I want to know what Gospel Temperance is. The close association of religion with, total abstinence is a 4angerous form of tyr^n^ ,

and will lead to all uncharitableness. A lot of my friends are getting too near to mating an eleventh, commandment, " Thou shalt not tipple, neither with thy neighbor's wife nor his man servant nor his maid servant, nor in thy neighbor's house, nor with thy sisters nor with thy cousins nor with, thine aunts." I hate read lately of the relapse of several Salvationists to wallowing in the ,mire. Most,_x)f them i have- professed ;}! ■!! Vy their former crimes,, and now ' iL.y certify their professions. In other words, they are collecting a iresh set of testimonials. .The only question formerly,, asked of them was — •' How long have you been' in Pentridge prison,?" , • ". Oh, about twenty years or so, Iguess^' •• Ah, you'll do. Tell the people tha A , and it'll draw/ I stiggest that for decency's sake another question be added ; to the examination : How lbng have you been out pi prison ? » :. ■ I ha.ye seen this week in a northern paper an advertisement—" Found, a set o£ artificial teeth. Owner can have,'- ' etc. Whether they were male or female was nut stated, "neither have I heard whether they were earned.,:) l can understand a man losing Ms hat under certain conditions, his ;;wig, his cork leg! his glass eye, his "borrowed whiskers, but confound me if I .can- imaike ; out' his losing his' teeth." I wonder if. some wag had found a saw, or a rake, or a comb. i I see that a Colonial, youth, . a Queens-* lander, is the' first scfholar of this " year in t he Empire, in other words is " Senior Wrangler," at Cambridge. ,,, Is that Competition confined to the male p^rsuas^on ? It seems to me that the r l^fdmen would have a good show in a wrangling corny petition. ( I think there has been a miscarriage of law, if not of justice, in the late breach of promise case, in Dunedin. ; The man was married" ' and ' ' was' ' practically fine'&' < L 250 for not; riittrrying again. Now ' if ■ 'he . . had ' married * Mrs. ; JFyner:; more and, 4 her .eight children; he wouM? ' r i4:dve' JVJ> been iiaprisoned j for bigamy, and she would have received rnorocpmpensation.for No. 9 at all.. Such 4 I'awV & * • - ■ 31/ lv ; While lam in' Court I must rreferr r tb k old Judge Johnston's savage reproof of ■ ; slang3 " 1 told the ;b6bKy,"jsMid 8 juryman, •'jfchat I wasn't the man." " fTold who 1" roared"fclie judge. '* I told 1 the '■ feotebyl" ''said the •fdUo^toabfcently. j 'Mi iknoyr what, you .mean,' sir, , yoi;, mean the policeman. , But don't, .use , slang here. I'll not have it. It's contempKof uoitrt.'o .The' jiidge isiusefdto • legal ,^fietions abQuj;,, everybody knowing the law, and tlkere>' 'fore supposes that everybody kjidws'j what is slang, and- what- is -not. I Ti£e ijudge i& afraidj ithaty if , jallowed-to get a foothold^slang -inig'ht 1 'grdduialiy cree^p up and speak of- '-'beaks/' etc. j 'Not" everybody "krlbws -the^OTigin^of the. term " bobby/L so I may give it. j JRoberjfc Peel reprganised the ppKce. force "and did away with the old' wafchinan. H&iee the new force" Were " called 'Bobbles (from Sir Eobert)land (Peelers^ The word " beak " formerly jjmeant a necklace or, badge of office, ' and, llence got applied io ' magistrates 'a'n'd' Juagfesi'' "■">