CURRENT TOPICS.

Lyttelton Times, Volume CVI, Issue 12571, 5 August 1901, Page 4

CURRENT TOPICS.

Or.ee again, simultaneous ly with' the revival of the craze for a. universal language, comes a cry for » reform of our spelling. Th«

SPELLING AXD I'HOKCKCIATIOK.

Wants are seeking.for a uniformity, pho-

tiiiic'OT otherwise, and their voice will not be stilled. How, they ask grandiloquently, can foreigners bo expected to learn our language and to. pronounce it properly while 'so. many vagaries, exist? ' And then they instance the story cf the Spaniard whose first lesson in English pronunciation jras embodied in the lines "Though the tough cough and hiccough «.. plough me through, . ' ... O'er life's dark lough ray way. I still pursue." His 'dignity revolted against such inconsistency, and he talked Spanish for th.fi rest of his life. There is a long and pleasing American poem which also satirises our pronunciation on similar lines, and which says, among other things—- " An. old couple living in Gloucester Had a, beautiful girl, but -they loucester; . She fell' from a, yacht, And never -the spachb . Could be found where the- cold waves had . iouces'ter." "An old lady living in Worcester Had a. gift of a, handsome young roces.er; But the way that it crough, As.'twould, never get through, . Was more than- the lady was Worcester." * At the bar in the old inn .at Leicester "Was a beautiful barmaid named' Heicesier;. i She gave io each guest Only what was.the huest;: 'va'; And-they all, with one 'accord, -bleicester.", JJI certain Dr Wayland, of Philadelphia, ' one better than this in his analysis, ...»nd drove his friends crazy by asking them •'What does Ghoughphtheightteeau spell?" iH.is answer was "potato," and his genius explained it thus : Gh—p, as in hiccough; 3ugh—o, as in dough; phth—t, as in phthisis; eigh—a, as in neighbour; tte—t, as in gazette-;, and eau—-o, as in beau; He is dead new. Equally , ingenious, though only from ignorance, is the,-.liyery dtablo keeper's bill, the items,.of Avhj.ph.. ran: "Aosfaada 7s 6d; Atacinonimomagin Is." The English equivalent, in the vernacular, was explained to be "A 'oss for a, day, 7s 6d; A-takin' on 'im 'ome agin, If." In any case,.if we were all to spell alike, where would be the butts for the purists and the themes for the satirical pcrtaster? Variety is the very spice of life.-* And as regards the foreigners—well, it's.our language, not theirs.

Few men of the , age

THE rEIAL.OF PEERS.

have had their matrimonial affairs so persistently discussed in ; . public as Lord" Russell. He Vas' ''marrietr :

.ii 1390, and within a year his wife?tiedunsuccessfully for a •divorce. Three-years later the Countess applied for restitution of conjugal rights, and the Earl replied ■with a prayer for judicial separation. In 1897 he proceeded against his sister-in-law for libel, and more recently, he divorced his wife in America and married again. When ha was arrested for bigamy the question at once arose whether he could be tried. by the ordinary courts of justice.. He had the right to appeal-to the Hcuse of Lords for trial, but it was not clear whether he could waive the privilege: The "Law Times" holds that if a peer is committed for trial in a case of felony there is no *optioa, and the case must be carried to the House of Lords. An Irish, noble Avas tried by his ( peers' in 1798, on the eve of the rebellion] in the person, of the EarL cf Kingston, for l shooting Colonel Fitz Gerald. The trial was carried out with the utmost state and solemnity. The Lord Chancellor, •who acted as Lord High Steward, carrying a white wand, presided. The accused came from. Dublin Castle, where he was incarcerated, to tho Farliament House, which he entered preceded by the Ulster King at Arms carrying -his escutcheon, and close by stood' the executioner bearing his axe with its edge averted from the prisoner. The, peers wore their robes of estate, and walked in procession to their House. Lord Kingston was unanimously pronounced not guilty, and the Chancellor broke his wand aiid, dissolved the assembly. The last trial of a peer by Ms peers was that of Lord Cardigan in 1841, and then sixty-five years bad: passed since its predecessor, when the Duchess of Kingston was tried for the very offence with.which Lord Russell was charged. Sir Fitzjames Stephen says, in his " History of the Criminal Law in Engl&d," that there have been only four trials,, of peers in the House of Lords since the'end of the reign of George 11., that oi Lord Ferrers for murder in 1760, that of Lord Byron for murder in 1765, and those of the Duchess of Kingston and Lord Cardigan. Bishops, singularly enough, are not entitled to be tried by the peers, but they have the right to assist in the trial of other peers ."-until it'comes to a question of the loss of life or limb."

In open market at the present time one can purchase a ton of best refined, loaf sugar for something less'than

HIGH-PRICED. SUGAfi.. ' \

£2O, but at'Hackney, the ,day,., no less than £972 19s was paid at auction, fpr... a ton of the common article. Naturally, a queer tale hangs upon the sale of loaf sugar at about 8s B£d a pound. This is how it came about. Messrs Clarke, Nickolls, and Coombsi tihe well-known jam makers ' of Hackney, were engaged in a quarrel with the Inland 1 Revenue authorities over income tax. The firm, shares a percentage of its profits' with its 3000 workpeople. The Revenue officials proposed; to assess income tax on the gross profits, including the proportion which goes to the workpeople/and the firm maintained that this would mean a .direct v income tax upon the "m J ages.?of girls earning in some cases only ,10s a week, whereas -the, legal limit for exempt incomes was £l6O a year. The'managing director sent to the Revenue Department a cheque for the amount of tax claimed, less .the*sum due.on ; the. workers' shave, of the profits. The Revenue people refused to accppt „tfce settlement and the dispute culminated in the authorities placing a broker's :mam in charge of the factories. For six Says he sat on some sugar sacks, and then on auction of sugar was held: at the_ factory to raise th« sum claiimed by the revenue,' £972 19s. ; ' Messrs Clarke, Nickolls arid Coombs received the auctioneer in style, drawing up their' fire brigade in full uniform' as a guard of ihonour. Meanwhile writes our London correspondent, the " Jew boys" from all parts of London had flocked to Hackney in hopes of being able to secure rsweet bargains. The auction began: " Lot p.: One ton of best refined loaf sugar—- . What offer V' A visitor named five pounds, 1 but the words were hardly out of his lips before a voice said' "I bid £500." The 'Jews gasped, and the auctioneer grinned, as bids of fifty and a hundred' pounds raised fche .pries swiftly to £9OO, and then to £972 19». "Any more?" cried! the auctioneer, " going-going-gone!" And the lot Jwaj knocked dowa to the head of the ißrm, amd the distraint was satisfied. The Speculators were furious; and one man demanded of the auctioneer, " Yafc ■you calls dis. game? 'Ere .I come all ze vay from Voolich to puy shea-ps sugar und to find dig axshion vas a damdb schvindles. I demandt mine fare und egsbenses I do." ,He was backed up by his compatriots, and there was a prospect of complications, but the' fire brigade and the hosepipe began to look tyke business, and tie disappointed *' boys " departed, ©wearing stramje oaths^