BETWEEN WHILES

Hokitika Guardian, 30 September 1929, Page 8

BETWEEN WHILES

Teacher (taking class in Scripture): What is absolution ? Pupil: The stuff you mend punctures with.

Two business men were sitting together in a cinema watching a crook film, when one turned round to the other and said: “Abo, I forgot to close the safe when we left office.” Tiie other replied: “Well, that’s all right, ain’t it? We’re both here.”

Two small boys were walking along a street when, on passing a church, one was overheard to say to the other: “I say, Jim, why do they put a cook on a church spire instead of a hen?” “Don’t know why? Well, because it would be too far to fetch the eggs!”.

An actor arriving in a little country town was looking over some rooms and, inclining to be fussy, inquired: “Are-you sure the sheets are clean?”

“Clean,” cried tfie landlady, indignantly, “of course they are. They’ve only just come from the laundry. Feel them yourself, they’re still damp.”

“What is the cause of lumbago, father?”

“Too late hours and too much drinking,” replied the clergyman, severely. “These are the only causes, and, had you taken my advice, you would not be in this painful state.”

“Oh, I’m all right, father. It was the Bishop I was anxious about. I see in the paner that lie is suffering from lumbago.”