THE MANUFACTURE OF COWARDS.

Hawera & Normanby Star, Volume XLVI, Issue XLVI, 30 May 1914, Page 9

THE MANUFACTURE OF COWARDS.

The other day I sat for a while in? Bfi waiting-room of a busy dentist Suddenly mto the room, with i& atmosphere of strained quietness theiS t'nenupon the other, the very picSa of m,sery and apprehension "2 vJ h&Ve CX le the souud of » cry W the operating room—a ciiiJd's cry j%. itdiea away the woman turned to tha other occupants of the waitiiic-room and asked breathlessly, <<I G £ ove? 9 ™ Sf"/ 88 11<?t ovei,--^other and another cry, cries not of pain, but of tear, came from the other room and then the dentist summoned the agisted mother to take charge of her child It was a little E irl who ca^e back mto the room-a child of some I' Sriustv Sh WV thi^X* and and lusty looking— and she clung to Now T *£>** fri2htened faby? Now, I have had a good deal of experience with dentists, and there is, dSa^Ytl that i? neV6r ™»<* toW <J ei .a^rthe small amount of oain they do inflict m the course of tne? ye% awkward and ticklish work. I hav£ taken little children many timeTt^ have their teeth attended to, an? not once have I seen them suffer seriously bo 1 was curious enough to enquire when my own turn came, what hai fe n th + c, ca, llse °. f the child's cries kn%. the mother's agitation. A tooth had been extracted— with local anaesthetics! of course; but the cries had been ut^ TW y°T r S? t* 00** 1 was touched. That was I think, just what I ha* expected to hear. For I am quite* satisfied that no dentist nowadays ever hurts a child enough to make it scream I have thought a good deaf about the incident, and have come to the conclusion that it may be possible to save spme children a good deal of suffering if I point out to mothers that it lies almost entirely with them to make their children courageous orcowardly.

_ For the mother, not the dentist, waa to blame for that child's cries. Think C- l? c fff^ fc y:>on a little Kirl of the* of her mother flying f rom the i^ m x l lth h? r fin £6rs ia her earsf What the mother could not baar to seeor hear, how should she expect tha child to endure? I have no doubt that the child imagined that elhe eufI rered—that the experience was a [terrifying one. How else could ehet i-e?Rj m ter m<>tker'a nervousness? No 1 child of that age is wise enough to tnmk her mother a fool. There must be, she reasons subconsciously, a cause* for the mother's fears. I can imagine* how the child was prepared for the ordeal, because.. pain or no pain a visit to the dentist is an ordeal. I can imagine the caresses, the eoothings, the promises of reward lavished by thadotmg mother upon a child already made nervous and sensitive by the: pain of toothache. And then, the* mother, trembling with anticipatory suffering herself, led the trembling child to the chamber of terror that, the childish mind had conjured up. Could anything be more cruel or more unfair?1 In these days it ie imperative* that children should be taken to the* dentist; it is one of the necessary experiences of life; and when all is said and done, it is not a very trying experience. The anticipation is', rnuchr the worst part of "it, and if children? are taught to face the experience with courage, even the, anticipation .„■ loeesmost of it® unpleasantness. But, of course, this is only one of many experiences which the child may be calledT upon to face, and the same arguments applies to all. To face them with, courage is to rob them of half their terrors. The greatest suffering that we know is that created by our own. imaginations.

Children are not naturally cowards.. Some, of course, have less active imaginations than others, and their anticipations have less intensity. But, they are all extremely sensitive to the moods and mental condition of those who care for them, and especially of their mothers. The first lesson that awise and thoughtful mother learaa. from her children is the. need for selfcontrol. If She herself gives way perpetually to her fears, how can she expect pluckiness from the child, who instinctively takes her as its model. Ifc is not an easy matter to acquire courage after one 'is grown up. That fact I may candidly admit to have discovered myself. But it is possible to learn., to refrain from the audible or visibleexpression of one's fear. If yoxir child, for instance, climbs on the roof», and you discover him in a dangerous^ and precarious position it is not necessary to cry out in alarm, to warn hint that he may fall and break his neckj yet that 1® what many mothers dov even when they do not really believethe danger to be so great. The best plan, in such circumstances, would bate- assume as calm a manner as possible, and to give some quite matter-of-fact reason for getting him down. He will descend with far less risk if h.& is not alarmed. Then, when he; is. down, find some, other reason than the danger for asking him not to repeat the performance. Enlarge upon the. possible danger to the roof or hi*; clothes. Any sound, convincing reason will do, provided it does not suggest that he ought to be afraid. It is a good rule never to create a fear. If" the fear exists already, then the child must be taught to control if, not to let it master him. It is useless to scoff at it, or to try to laugh it away. Thosemethods of ten do more harm than, good. The child must learn its own lesson. When he has satisfied "himself that his fears are groundless, the battle i^, won. I have one email.girl who? is afraid to ride on the front of- a tram. Her lively imagination foresees accidents and collisions. Whenever possible I take her on the front of a tram. If lam not with her, I preferthat 6he should not ride there. But when I am with her, I endeavor, bytalking to her, to keep, her mind engrossed, so that for the time being she*. forgets her fears. In this way 6he i* growing accustomed to the experience. Perhaps the fear will never leave heraltogether; but she will learn to disregard it. Pluck is not the entire absence of fear, but the ability to "sifc upon it." We owe it to our children that we should try to make them plucky. If we let them regard a visifcto the dentist as a terrifying experience, how will they be able in later life to face, say, a serious operation. We must teach. them to reverence courage, and to recognise it in the little everyday incidents of life. To d» this whilst they are young is to save them an enormous amount of sufferinjc' as they pass through life. —"Vesta,'* in the Melbourne Argus.