Page 7 Advertisements Column 3

Hutt News, Volume 16, Issue 14, 2 September 1942, Page 7

MATTRESS COVERS (As Illustrated) 1 Protect your Mattresses. Keep | them neat and clean with one ? of these Covers. .We make I them to your order in various ! materials. Prices on Appliea- | tiori. f I Don't Forget...! I OUR ' I XMAS LAY-BY WILL HELP YOU WITH ; YOUR | Xmas Gifts ONLY 3 MONTHS TILL ; xmas ::

CHEATING A publican, oi' Irish extraction, no ticed a drop in his bar takings. Suspecting dishonesty, he kept watch through a hole pierced in the floor of the room above. Sure enough, during a lull the barman took a handfull of notes from the till and sorted them into two groups, muttering as he dealt them alternately, "One for me, one for the boss," until he came to the last—an odd one. He hesitated a moment, then placed it on his own pile. This crowning act of unsportsman ship was too much for the proprietor "Now, now, me bhoy!" he exploded. 'Twas my tur-r-n!" * # # # , A LUCKY DOG A Glasgow man, whose business and private reputation would not have stood too much scrutiny, ultimately found h'imself in the dock on a serious charge. But his lawyers played their part so skillfully that the judge dismissed the case, telling the accused that he ''left the dock without a stain on his character." On leaving the building one of his cronies approached him, and remark ed: "Man, Jamie, did you hear what his Lordship said about your character. Wasn't it a darned good job you were arrested, you lucky dog/" * # # # SYMPATHETIC ''Yes, lady, I lost my leg working in a mineral mine," said the tramp. "Ah." replied the old lady, "few of us realise the dangerous work necessary in .order to provide us wilh our ginger beer and lemonade"