Riddle Competition

Hawke's Bay Tribune, Volume XV, Issue 60, 21 February 1925, Page 10

Riddle Competition

There was once a WctMihg in the sen. What was the bridegroom’s name? John Dory. What was the bride’s name? Ann Chovy (anchovy). What was the bridegroom’s present to the bride? Her ring (herring). What was, the bride’s mother.’ A dear old soul (sole). How did they illuminate the wedding feast? With lamp-ray (Lampreys). Where did lhe bride and bridegroom live’ In a watering pined (plaice;; What kind of voice had John Dory Bass. When Ann Chovy wanted to wake her husband? What did she say? Stir John (sturgeon). —Prize of J/- to Mary Lovell-Smith (age 12 years), Clive road, Hastings. Two lines of a totnl of sixteen words can bo made from the following: yyuyyubicuryy for me. J Answer: Too wise you are., too wise you be—--1 sec you nre too wusc for me. —lied certificate to Maud TTohes (age 12 years), Post Office, Hastings. Why didn’t Eve get the measles? Because she had Adam (had’em) Orange certificate to Marjorie Bateman, Paki Paki, Hawke’s Bay (11 years.) Why arc deaf people like Dutch cheeses? Because wc cannot make them Kero (hear). —Lorna Clifton (aged 9 years), Lucknow road, Havelock North. Why is a short tempered man like a clumsy doctor? Because he is liable to lose his patience (patients). —Marjorie Ward (age 10 years), Kaiapo road, Hastings. Why is a man lifting a side of bacon off a hook, to be pitied? Because he is a pork readier (poor creature). —Violet Bicon in T *gc 8 years), 208 Riverslca road, Hastings. What is it that moves all the time yet is still in the same place? Your heart. —Laura Beale 10 years), 407 l itzroy Avenue, Hastings. Whta is the right thing to say, The yolk, of an egg is white or the yolk of an egg are white? Neither. The yolk of an egg is yellow. —lvy Brennan (age 9 years), 208 Riverslea road, Hasting®. What was the first thing Charles the First did on coining to the throne? Looked to sec if anybody had left a bent pin on it. —Cyril Cooper (age 11 years), 801 Jervoist street, Hastings. When is a tree as comfortable as a bed? When it is down. • —Doris Cocks (age 10 years) 404 Park rod, Hastings. WKy did the fly fly? Because the spider spied her. —Doroth. Shepard (ago 10 years;, Havelock North. What does a man gain if he marries a widow named Elizabeth, with, i-wo children? —A second-hand lizzjij, jind and a couple of runabouts. —.James Wapren (age 9 j-ears), 503 Nelson street, Hastings. Why is a young horse like an egg?—Because neither is useable until broken. —Hazel Hinman (age 11 years), Ruatamwha.

Why is an author like a criminal ?— Beacuse both have to work out their sentences. —Glyn Balo (age 8 years), Havelock Vordi. Why arc the English not now wearing stockings?—Because the All Blacks them socks. —Truby Bale (age 6 years). Havelock North. Whj’ is a fishmonger an unpleasant man Because his business makes him sell fish (selfish). —Myra Banks (age 12 years), 512 Heretaunga street. Hastings. Four stiff slanders, four liquorlanders. two cronkers, two ajid a swing about?—A cow. Frtur stiff standers are its legs, fonr liq iotlanders are its teats, two crookers tn* its horns two lookers arc its eyes, and the swing-about is its tail. --Rauma Godfrey (age 9 years) 100<> Waipuna street, Hastings. Why do you spell “Bank” witli a largo “B” ?—Bl‘cause a bank is no good without a large capital. —Nila Tayler (age 10 years), 107 Grey 3 road. Hastings. Which is the best way tn save £1 ?— Buy a guinea pig for a shilling. —lx'slie Tayler (age 13 years), Grey’s road, Hastings. # A little wood a little wiry, a little house without a fire?—A birdcage, —Verdun Godfrey (ago , K years)* 1006 Waipuna street, Hastings. What is it that everyone wishes for and yet tries to get nd of?— A good nppe’titite. —Ronald Gibbs (age 11 years), 505 Gray’s road Hastings. Why do black sheep eat less than white?—Because there are not so many of them. —Ruth Small (age 11 years), Te Mata road. Havelock North. When is a fence like a great discovery?—When it is wireless. -—Gwon Field (ago 10 years), Maraetotara, Havelock North. When is a soldier like a baby?— When lie is in arms. —May Harrison (age 11 years). 708 Fitzroj* avenue, Hastings. If you buried a Chinaman and a feather together, what would you grow from them?—A Jonquil (John-quill). —Agnes Reynolds (age II years), St. Andrew’s road, Havelock North. ® ® MY HOLIDAYS. Dear Chief Kiwi, —I went to Clive Grange for my holidays. We went in for a swim every day. When we came out of the water w© had a swing and a see-saw, and many other ganr’s. Nex» door to us there lived a little "iri named Mary. We played with her nearly every day. I non? I will ha’-p t happy time next Christmas as I had this Christmas. —May Harrison (ago 11 years), 708 Fitzroy Avenue, Hastings.

MY FAVOURITE PETS. Chief Kiwi, —Although, in this work! there are many pets, mv favourite one is the dog. What splendid companions they are* No friend could □e more faithful; and many are the stories told of lives saved by the fidelity of a dog to its master. They will guard our lives if need be; they will hunt,,run errands, or play with us. • They will do anything but speak, and how hard they seem to try to do that! With a little experience we can easily interpret their peculiar little barks ami cries. It seeing as if dogs are so higlny intelligent that they can be trained to do wonderful things. The Esquimo dogs are used to draw heavily-laden sledges across the great wastes or ict and snow in Greenland, while in some parts of Europe dogs are used for Our most useful dog is probably the collie, and what shepherd coukl manage without his dog? These sheep-dogs have a won derful knowldge of their work, theii skill being almost more than nuumu. Alas ! often they get very little thanks from their masters, who appear to think that punishment is a better incentive to work than reward. - —Garlics Milligan <agc 12 years), Mangateretere. @ ® HARVESTING. Dear Chief Kiwi, —We have been very busy harvesting this year, but besides-tne work we also have plenty ot time to Watch the interesting process oi threshing. Every morning we are up early to finish our Work and l*o scamper out to the fields Where ah "one can hear is the busy drone, drone or the engine. One of the most busy occupations is the cooking to be done for the meh. The tWo fiiill-men come in for their breakfast between six and half-past and When the disnes are cieai'eu a..a\ the baking for the day commences in lull >swing. There is the morning “smoko” at ten o clock, then dinner. Then the at ter noon “smoko” at three o’clock, and it the men work late they have another at half-past five, and lastly tea. Dear Kiwi, would you like to uo all that baking? iam sure you wouldn’t. When we go over to the fields we have beautiful fun riding on the sledges, and when the tractionengine snnts from one place to another we sit in tile van and nave a ride. 1 remember the day the engine arrived my sister and 1 ran down the road to meet it and get a ride, but 1 can tell you we were all very thankful to get rid of it because of all the extra work. Dear Chief Kiwi, never take up harvesting, it is too much work, I can assure you. —Uene Heynes (age 12 years), Box 7, Clive. » & « AUTUMN.

Dear Chief Kiwi, I am now going tc tell the story of “Autumn." Autumn is a very beautiful season. The sky is always a clear blue, and hen and there are clusters of snowy whin clouds. There are four seasons, spring, summer, autumn and wintei. In autumn the corn is a very rich yellow, the heads wave in tne genck breeze. The ripening fruit amongst its bright leaves is plucked by the pickers brown hands. The birds twitter in the trees and peck at some red plums or any othe: fruit they can find. The sound of a reaper cutting the grain in a near-bj field can be heard. The grasshoppers am. ants aro busy collecting the spare graim they can. find to put towards ifieir stoic: for the winter. The grass is fresh am green and the fallen fruit makes a very pretty picture of nature. At every gentle breeze the colourec leaves come floating down, and the tree, are left bearing only a little fruit while on the ground there is nothing but a mass of rich coloured leaves. Tin. codlin moth seek shelter and the insects seek new homes, while the birds fl) away to find places to build their nest while the sun is shining. The wind; blow the leaves and they are carrieu away, and winter comes to take autumn’s place. —Frances Probert (age 12 years?, care Mrs D. E. Probert, Hcrctaunga eteet, Hastings. ® ® 9 TWO KITTENS.

Dear Chief Kiwi, —This time I am going to tell you about two dear little Kittens. Une ot them is our own, but the other one likes to come here too. The white kitten's name is Snowy, but my little sister wid insist on calling it Kiwi, therefore you have a pussy Kiwi too. 'lhe other one which is ours is a little grey one, and is called 'liger. The other day when we were having’our breakfast Snowy jumped on to the chair anti put her paws on the table and waited for her breakfast. After that they had a game or causing up and down the passage. Once Snuwy •hid behind tne door and naneu »u. Tiger to pass, and when she dkl Snowy jumped upon her. As soon as they set loot in our place they’ ruii straignt to their tin in which we keep their milk. —Marjory Edwards (age 10 years), Victoria street, Hastings. ®- ® MY CHRISTMAS HOLIDAYS. Dear Chief Kiwi, —My Christmas holidays were spent most enjoyably. first of all we went to Jfairlie. there was a flood the day after Christmas day. After we left r airlie we went and stayed at Timaru. It was very nice. 'There were crowds of people on Caroline Bay. There were merry-go-round, swinging boats and side-shows. Then we went to Christchurch. We went to see the gardens and they were very pretty. There were over fifty acres of fetrdens. After we had a look at the w r e went to the museum. There were lions, tigers, monkeys, seals, elephants, and all kinds of animals stuffed, skeletons of all kinds and Maori tools. The boat left Lyttelton at a quarter to eight, iwas sorry when it was time to come home. —Gladys Loomes (age 12 years), 402 Eastbourne street, Hastings. & 9 9 A DAY AT REDCLIFFE.

Dear Chief Kiwi, —I am going to tell you about a day that I spent at Kedcliffe . At Redchffe there are many blackberries so we took tins to gather them. We left home at 9 a.m. The roads were rough and the trap was bumpting up and down. 1 was sitUiig in the front so 1 did not get as many bumps as mum and dad. When we reached there 1 jumped out first and found the first blackberry. 1 said to my sister. “See who will lie first to hii the tins.” It was great fun, for they were tempting, but I did not like to stop to eat any in case my sister would get her tin full first. She was eating as many as she put in her tin so 1 beat her. Alter 1 was tired of picking berries I went and had a paddle. There were some other children swimming. 1 did not have much of a paddle as 1 was watching the other children. Dad had told me not to be more than ten minutes but it was such fun watching these children that 1 forgot what l>ad had told me. Instead of ten minutes I was twenty minutes. After lunch 1 felt like picking again, so we started When we had about lOlbs. we had afternoon tea. Mum said ”." e must go now as we have a long drive home.” We left there about p.m. and arrived home at 5 p.m. Then we had tea and went to bed very tired. Best wishes, to you and all your other Kl 2jfhelma Symes (age 12 years), 1105 road, Hastings,

A DREAM. Dear Chief Kiwi, —I firn now going to tell you about a little girl who dreamt that she ran away from home because her mother gave her a whipping. Joan, as the little girl’ s name was, was sitting on a log in the woods sobbing as if her heart would break, when a fairy dressed in blue stood beside her. Joan thought she felt someone beside her, and, on looking up, she saw to her great surprise a beautiful little fairy. The fairy then said: “May I ask why you are crying?” Joan then answered, •Mother gave me a whipping for disobeying her, so I ran away.” The fairy smiled at this and then told Joan to run home again to her mother, who would be worrying about her. Joan started to go but was awakened by Sier mother calling her to get up for breakfast, and at the table she tokl her mother her dream and she said she was pleased it was not true. —Myra Banks (age 12 years), <512 Teretaunga street, Hastings. ® ® $ A VISIT TO A SHEEP FARM. Dear Chief Kiwi, —Have you ever been on a .sheep-farm about dipping tlmo or shearing time. Once I visited a sheep farm at shearing time and the process very much interested me. The sheep are mustered and put in pens the night before. They must be perfectly dry before being shorn. The pens they are put in are called slight pens. 1 saw some men each puh a sheep out of some pons. J hey laid them down and took the shears. There is a comb joined to the shears winch passes between the cutter and the skin. They clipped the wool from the sheep’s body, liiis could not be done without the aid of machines. The ygive power to tfie cutters to clip the wool irom the sheep, and it is a quicker way than hand-shearing. A boy or man gathers up ttye wool and spreads it on a table where it is classed and rolled up and put in different heaps. It is then put in a press and pressed. The bale is sewn up and marked., I was very sorry when my visit came io an end. *"1 could have spent iminy-a-day watching the sheep being shorn. They look so nice and white wncn their neece is off. —Hazel Hinman (age 11 years), Ruataniwha.

& 9 8 A HAPPY AFTERNOON. Deal- Chief Kiwi, —We went to our cousin’s station up the 1 uki '1 iu. river on Sunday. There are many gates to open which Daddy told me to carefuhy shut or the sheep might get mixed up. Our cousins took us to see their puppies and polo ponies. We played with the puppies. The garden is very pretty and there is a tennis court. There w’exe a lot of sheep and bullocks in the paddocks, he laughed at the sheep that ran along the road in front of our car. W e started for home at six o’clock and arrived back at twenty minutes to seven. \\e sawsome hares and Daddy nearly ran over one. We had lovely views of the river, it looked so shiny and blue. —.Joan Natuseh (age 8 years), ilavc.ock North. « « MY HOLIDAYS. Dear Chief Kiwi,—This will be the first time 1 have written to you. i am going to write about my holiday in Auckland. The scenery going through .n the irain was beautiful, but just before we reached the Gorge, we went through such u long tunnel that J thought we were never coming to the end of it.

The first few days we were able to go to the lovely beaches. One day we went to Devonport, another da J’ to Judge’s Bay, and a few of the other ones; but when infantile paralysis broke out we were very disappointed because we could not go anywhere. Where my auntie lived you only had to run down the road a little way and down some steps and you were on the beach; so we spent most of our time there. After a very happy holiday we left Auckland and returned to our home in Hastings. —Sybil Ogilvie (age 10 years), 700 Frederick street, Hastings. & & PRINCESS YVONNE.

Dear Chief Kiwi, —Princess Yvonne sat at an open window, looking out upon her garden of flowers. She was very beautiful, with a face as fair and sweet as a rose. Not far off sat, watching her, her young cousin, Lorna, with a frown on her brow.

'l’here was bitter hatred in'Lorna’s heart because Yvonne was rich anil she was poor; because Yvonne would, in time, be a queen and she one o? ficr subjects. Moreover, Yvonne was so beautiful and good that the 1 anic^ ot her loveliness had spread far and v, me; anu it was for her beauty that TTorntt hateu tier more than for any tiling else,

But, while Yvonne was looking out of lhe window, a noble knight passed that

way; and so dclighteo was he with the rare sweetness of her face that he forgot himself, and paused a moment tc gaze at her. But Lorna had seen the knight, and knew he was the royal Reginald, Prince of a distant land. She ground her teeth in rage, for she had determined that the Prince should never see her beautiful cousin.

So she got a wicked fairy to change the Prince into a lion ami Yvonne into a iamb, for she thought the lion would kill the lamb. But she was wrong, for they became very friendly, and after a year they were changed into their right forms. Then Prince Reginald and Princess Yvonne were married, and tney made a happy pair for the rest cf their lives. —Maggie Brennan (age 13 years), 208 N Riverslea road, Hastings. JOKES CROWDED OUT LAST WEEK Teacher: What is the milky way? liuooy: n s me path t<»e cow took when it jumped over the moon. —riuriu i’fuciiley, age n years, 305 Eiiibuu road, Hastings. A Jewish doctor had recently been elected to membership in an exclusive country goll club. Tne master caddy had asked him if he desired to have ins name imprinted on his golf balls. ‘And you vould put my name on a dozen balls for dat price?” “Yes,” was the response. “And vould you put on it my address too? “Yes.” ••for de same price?” “Yes.” • Veil, den, tor de same price vould you mind putting on it. tow, •Office hours 9 to o' ? ’ —Renata \\alker, age 13 years, 907 Albert street, Hastings, Freshman: “You surely are a good dancer.” Co-ed: “Thank you. I'm sorry I can’t return the compliment.” Freshman: “You could if you were as big a bar as 1 am.” —Bob May, age 11 years, Riverslea road, Hastings. One day a pakeha met a Maori riding a nice looking horse slowly along the road, and he asked if he would se 1 it “Oh yes,” said the Maori, “but he no look well.” The pakeha said. “Oh, that’s all right, he'll do me.” So he bought him. A lew days later he noticed that the horse bumped into a fence as if he hadn’t seen it. So he examined him, and found that the horse was blind. When he met the Maori again he said, “That horse you sold me is blind.” “Yes. I know’,” said the Maori. “I tell you he no “look well.” —Myrtle Taylor, aged 11 years, McLean street, Havelock North.