A MULE THAT COULD KICK.

Hawke's Bay Herald, Volume XXI, Issue 5440, 22 July 1879, Page 3

A MULE THAT COULD KICK.

Once a tPeek, in ita April part, contains a very varied assortment of matter, and makes up a capital number. The most amusing portion is under the head of " Gleanings." and tho following is a good sample of the whole : —

" ' Speaking about mules,' remarked a six-footer from Harnett County, as he cracked his whip at market, ' I've got a mule at home which knows as much as I do, and I want to hear somebody say I'm half a fool.' No one said so, and he went on. 'I've stood arouiwl here and heard men blow about kicking fliufes till I've got disgusted. When you come down to kicking, I want to bet on my mule. A friend came along and took dinner with me the other day, and, as he seemed a little down-hearted, I took him out to see Thomas Jefferson, my champion mule. I Avas telling" the good man how that mule would flop his hind feet around, and he said he'd like to see a little fun. He passed his whole life in the South, and had never seen a mule lay his soul into a^big time at kicking.' ' Well,' he continued, after borrowing some tobacco, ' I took Thomas out of the stable, and back'd him up agin a hill, gin him a cuff on the ear, and we stood back to see the amusoment. It was a good place to kick his durndest, and what d'ye s'pose he did ] In ten minutes by the watch he was out of sight. In five more we couldn't feel him with a twelve-foot pole, and — and — ' The crowd began to yell and sneer, and the narrator looked around and asked, ' Doss anybody think I'm lying ? Would I lie for one mule ? Right here under my arm is a pound of tallow candles, which are to light the hole for me to go in after Thomas ; and I got word not an hour ago that the hind-feec of a mule were sticking out of a hill thirty-nine miles as the bird flies from where my mule went in ! I'm shaky on religion, gentlemen, but our family never had a liar in it. ' "