WHICH IS YOUR HUSBAND?

Hawera Star, Volume L, 10 January 1931, Page 16

WHICH IS YOUR HUSBAND?

Commissionaire’s Experiences

TXUSBANDS? Yes. I ought to know jand comes back and says did 1 see his something about them. Dozens of. wife while he was gone? them are left under, my eye every day, I Then there's the sporty man. As while their wives arc trying on hats and I soon as his lady is safe inside the shop other bits and pieces inside the snop,” [lie nips off and has a refresher. Then writes “A Commissionaire” in the he comes back and gazes in the win- “ Sunday News.” dows, picking out the pretties. After

There’s the usual impatient sort, who keep? saying, “You won't be long, win you, my dear?” while his wife is handing him the parcels. As soon as she’s out of sight lie's all on the jump to

that he watches the crowd going by, with a special eVe for anything young and snappy. His wife usually comes out fairly soon—she probably knows lie's not safe for more than ten min-

catch her coming out. He goes to the swing doors and looks through, getting his nose bumped by everyone wlio comes out. Then he starts asking me how many exits there arc, and when I say twenty he wonders if his old lady has used any of the other nineteen.

utes. A lot of husbands are just the tamed variety. They take up a spot near tae door and wait, looking bored, till they are wanted again. And there’s the explosive kind that waits two minutes and then gives me a shilling to tell his old lady he’s gone on to the club.

Then he goes inside the shop to look for her, but sees something and rushes out. Then he buys a paper and can’t read it for holding the parcels. Then he twiddles his stick and drops it, and half a dozen people fall over him while lie's picking it up. Then he goes off to have a look at the other nineteen doors.

Then there’s the talkative husband. Wants my opinions about buildings, an., beer, and Bolsheviks, and what-not. When lie’s about I always pray for plenty of taxis so as I can have something to do to dodge him. If there’s one thing that riles me it’s people who come asking me questions.