HARD ON THE HOSIER

Hastings Standard, Volume XII, Issue 5846, 9 May 1908, Page 2 (Supplement)

HARD ON THE HOSIER

S. e:ie: A hosier's shop. Enter a cuto American. American "See by the notice in your window that you don't serve Americans. Is that so?" Hosier (coldly): "Yes, sir. You see, your countrymen give a great deal of trouble looking at things they don't purchase. They don't seem to know what they want." A.: '" Now. that's a real pity '." Decidedly : "I know what I want; I want some- .shirts awful had!" H. (hesitating): "Well, sir, if yju—" A.: "And I want some morceiier socks—a dozen. Yes, I do." H. : '/Really, sir. I think I might make, an exception in vonr " A.: "And I gue.-s I want some kid gloves." H. (conquered I: "You will permit me to show yon " A.: "And I want -omethiug, t ;o. I reckon I want a few scarves. And what are yon umbrellas like'"" II.: "Our umbrellas, sir. are the host in the world." (Shouting) ''Here, John, William, Henry, Thomas, James, the shirts, socks, gloves, scarves and umbrellas —quick!" (Shopmen pile the counter with alacrity.) "Is there anything else you want, sir'.'" A.: "Wal. yes: I guess I want the money to pay for them.''

j People who reside in the vicinity of j Vesuvius have put to practical use the j lava, which has flowed from the vol- ] cano in repent wand past eruptions. Naples and its suburbs appear to bo a ivorl lof lava. The streets are pnvivl with it. and there are staircases, statue*, drinking fountains, 'and even jewellery of the same material.