Page 2 Advertisements Column 1

Grey River Argus, Volume XXXI, Issue 5305, 28 September 1885, Page 2

POST OFFrCE NOTICES. p SEA «OTK'> tyfAILS. For Jacksons Bay and South, per Napier, this day, at 9 a.m. For Wellington, per St. Kilda, this day, at 10 a.m. For Onehunga, per Oreti, this day, at 11 a.m. For Nelson, Westport, and Reefton, every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, at 6 30 a.m. For Christchurch, Dunedin and Austra: lian Colonies, via Christchurch, every Thursday, at 3 p.m. Money orders may be obtained and . letters registered one hour before the time of closing any mail. HUGH CALDERS, Chief Postmaster. Irate Cjhicago dealer—'l shall stand this trifling no longer, madam. If you don't bring the money for that jewellery within a week, I will send the bill to your husband, and you know what a row he will £ raise.' Fair Ohicagoan —'Send it. Send [it to him right off. Do. Perhaps you : think you know his address.' 'Iknow his ; residence. He lives where you do,l of |" course./. tfoh, no, he don't; not now. I got a divorce from him yesterday, and this morning he eloped with your wife. So there now.' After trying a man for murder, a Kansas judge once said, " I do wish they'd let some of our population die a natural death some- : times, if it was only to show what a tarnation glorious climate we have got!" A man bought an estate in Ireland the other day. He was of pmall stature, we are t told, and very thin and wiry-lnnVine. : Wh'pn he went riown to spe the place t-h<» tenants turnprl out to «e° the new.landlord, 0 and, aft<*r Tiisrifip vf-nre, b <va t.n discuss • 1 h.m. I Well. T«afc. what do you thi>k; of] *' the new linrVovrl l?" i«rvh V. g:rra;'-. Tv + ■much 1 Why, that little gossoon would be fe as hard to Bhoot as a jack-snipe!"