COLLEGE-TRAINED PARROTS

Greymouth Evening Star, 14 May 1927, Page 7

COLLEGE-TRAINED PARROTS

GRADUATES IN LANGUAGES

The State of Texas, associated in the minds of many with sheriffs and “bad men,” has established a milder and more gracious claim to fame. Its town of Brownsville boasts of a flourishing academy where thousands of parrots are annually made safe for society.

On arriving at the school the parrots are placed in the kindergarten department, and then, according to the talents they display, are moved up by easy stages into a. senior class from which they pass out with the proud title of ‘‘graduate parrot in the English language.”

That the birds are graduates in the English language must be a comforting thought to those who recoil in horror from present-day American “slanguage,” for should a sufficient number of parrots leave the school with honours, there may be a chance of the English tongue being preserved in the United States.

Apart fropi that, however, a uni-versity-trained parrot possesses a distinct advantage over the bird which has merely picked up its vocabularly in dubious haunts. The most respected aunt can be presented with a parrot of the newer kind with the certainty that the bird will never break away from faultless English to abuse the cat or to deliver itself of profanity when the vicar comes to tea.

On the other hand, it is to be hoped that a few parrots of the “old school” will be left to us for the benefit of retired mariners who like a bird with a fluent range of nautical expletives.