WEEK-END CHAT

Greymouth Evening Star, 29 August 1925, Page 8

WEEK-END CHAT

GRAIN AND CHAFE.

(By “Mackay”).

“Those who always depend on luck will soon have nothing else to depend on. ’ ’

“The mean person, who always saves for a rainy day, seems to expect a flood.”

“The question lor each man to settle is not what ho would do if ho had means, time, influence, and educational advantages, but what he will do with the things he has.”

A new game for the school holidays was invented this week by a High Street boy (aged 8), who said to his little friend (aged 5) : ‘‘Let’s pretend I’m your little dog, and you feed me with your sweets. Shall we?”

They were going to the football dance at the Town Hall, on Txiesday, and she said to her husband: “Which dress shall I wear?” “Oh, I don’t care. I never bother about trifles.” was his reply.

The speed-hog never would be passed, He bragged his car’s endurance. He passed six cars witli a backward glance— His wife has his insurance.

“Hullo” asked a Shakespeare Street resident, “are you using your lawnmower this afternoon.”

“Yes, I’m afraid I am. 1 ” “Splendid! Then you won’t be wanting your tennis racket—l’ve broken mine!”

“What makes you think that Jim would be a success in politics?” asked a "Runanga woman. “He can say more things that sound ■well and mean nothing than any other man I know.” said her husband.

A Cobden drama : At last the hour had come. He would soon know whether it was to be happiness or—He sighod, and then he squared his shoulders, while his lips set in a firm line. “What a coward I am,” he muttered. “After all, other men have had to face their wife’s first' cake. Why shouldn’t I come through alive?”

A smooth-haired young man was roughly threading his way at Victoria Park on Wednesday. He jostled ~ a young lady. She turned and gave him an indignant look. “Don’t bite me,” he remarked with a simper. “Don’t worry,” was the quiet reply “I am a Jewess.”

Two Blaketown boys on their way homo from Sunday school wore dis-

cussing the advept of their baby sister but neither could give a satisfactory, explanation of the new arrival. ,At last the elder boy said: “I know how it was.”

“How?” asked his 1 brother. “Why,” he exclaimed, “God 'said, ‘Lot there be Phyllis’, and there was Phyllis. ’ ’

Two Coasters visiting Christchurch for the “National” were walking in a suburb, when one of them pointing to a house, said : “There’s a beautiful place but its enough to make a man sad to look at it.”

“Why?” “Oh account of it’s history : for, despite it’s calm and serene surroundings, it was built upon the groans tears and wailings of thousands of people.” “You don’t say so!” . “It’s a fact. The owner is a dentist-

A Hokitika correspondent claims that this is an extract from a recent school

essay: — “The King was displeased with Daniel so he put him in a cage where there were a lot of lions. The next morning the King went to the top oi the c.en and called out, ‘Hello. Daniel what sort of a night have you had?’ ‘Oh, not so bad. your Majesty,’ replied Daniel, ‘but do you know that this place is simply infested with lions?’ ‘Lions?’ said the King, pretending to bo surprised. ‘Well, all I can say is you must have brought them with you!’ ”

On the occasion of a special service at a small Coast church the vicar of a largo Christchurch parish was persuaded to preach. The congregation was an agricultural one. After the sei-vice the clergyman stopped to speak to a farmer and asked him how many sheep he had in his flock.

“Three hundred. ’ replied the man. ,“That is ndthing,” said the other; “mv flock is over five thousand strong” “My word!” gasped the old shepherd; “you must have had a terribly busy time, last lambing season.”