CHILDREN'S CORNER.

Evening Star, Issue 12764, 17 March 1906, Page 10

CHILDREN'S CORNER.

Did <3od pin the stars up so' tight, in the Why did the cow jump right over the moon;? .' , An' why did the dish run away with the epooa? . ~ ' ' ■ 'Canse dickn't he like' it to sef the cow fly? Why, muwer, why? , Why, muvyer, why , , Can't little boys jump to the moon if they try? An' why can't they swdni just like fishes an' fiaags? An' why does the live little birdies have wings, • An' live little boys hare to wait till they die? ' Why, muwer, why? Why, muwer, why Was all of vose blackbirds all baked in a pie? Why couldn't we have one if I should say "Please"? An' why does it worry when little boys tease? An' why can't tings never be now—biit bime-by? Why, muwer, why? > Why, muwer, why Does little boys froats always ache when they cry? , An' why does it stop when they're cuddled up close? An' what does the sandman do days, do • you s'pose? An' why do you fink he'll he soon comdn' by? Why, muwer, wiry? —Ethel M. Keller, in the ' Century.' MORE HOWLERS. A Canadian school principal, Miss Agues Cameron, has been recently telling in the ' Century' some delightful stories of humorour incidents in school that have come under her attention. She tells, for example, of a boy who wrote: "When a gentleman/ walks with a lady on the public street, no gentleman waUas, inside the lady." To the question "What as dew?" came the well-reasoned reply: "The earth revolves on its own. acris three hundred and sixty-five times in. twenty-four hours. This rapid motioa through space causes its sides to This is called dew." llie mother of a child objected to a punishment given by the teacher to her boy, and calling upon the teacher asked, in tones that were icy: " Mies Harrington, I wish some information on this outrageous proceeding. Kindly tell me just what end you had in view in punishing my son." To which the teacher replied sweetly: "Why, Mhs Grant, I had the same end in view that anybody would have, in spanking a little boy." In a ireography ckus I asked: "Tom, your father is a sailor; would it be possible for him to start to-day to go round the world, and keep on sailing always in the same direction, till he came back to his starting-point?" "No, Miss Cameron." "Why?" "He's in gaol." Tt w:ks ;i little cprl wlwe imagination took the bib m its teeth with this audacious run acres* umm.ry : —' E.j.-v. t'- —'| known in literature". She patronised Shakespeare and imcourased gjcuioy. --h w»s dearly fond of hawks, and' horses and hounds, chivalry and cavalry,- and o'bor animals of the chase. In glory and' honor and majesty we see her strut "in her German warden. Raleigh set his cloak for her, but Elizabeth fondly died a maiden Queen." GERMAN CHILD HUMOR,

The following imstanoes of cbil<Sfea'e unconscious humor are supplied by the' N-enes Wi.oier Journ.il':

In a-nswer to the cfuestion. "What is a tunnel?" little Luchrag replies: "It is a tunnel when a mountain grows over the railway."

A little boy one© noticed some boxes on the platform of the railway station wilh

the form of a bottle stamped !on than. " What does the bottfe .mean, mamma?" he asked. Hia mother told - hdm that it meant that the boxes most be handled with care, because they contained; breakable*. " Oh,*? replied the little" leflow y w*i; you wonia put a ; bottle o.n my trousers, mother, so that father •would not beat me so hard." Little Frits had been punished, and was heard to sigh. "Why do you ogk so deeply?" he; ■was asked. "Because I should like to have a eon whom I could ■whip, too," be answered.

juvjsnile wrc. ; A small boy cams home one day witt, * badly disfigured face. The"oH maa** took him aside for the usual .heart-to-heart talk. "What have you been up to now?" asked he. "Fightin'," answered tie lad, sullenly. "And after all Fve said to you about fighting!" "Be smashed me on the cheek." "How often have I told you that the Good Book bids us turn the other cheek?" *'l did, dad—honest; but be smashed me on the twee. I call that a foul; so I pitched in and licked the sUiffin' cut of him. Dad, he's.been to Sunday school just as much as I have, and he ought to- know the rates."

Little Gladys: "Auntie dear, 6V> all the people who die and' go to the bad place camp out?" Aunt: "No, child. Why do you ask?" little.Gladys: "WeD, our Sunday teacher told us to-day that heat wa? in tents."

Father: " Well, Tommy, I hope you feel a good boy this morning?" Tommy: "No,daddy, not welly good and: not welly bad; just comfy." ' They had all teen to chnrch, and th« young monaster came home to dine with them. While at dinner they were discuesmg the new. stained glass window a member had given. "It is » most beautiful p>ecc of workmanship," paid one, "and llrast have cost a great deal of money.." "Do you have any idea how much?" "T really do not," replied the minister, "but far into Hi* rrtwlreds. I ehouM imatrine " "No, it didn't, either," said little Harold. I know liow match it was*. It cost fourteen pounds ten," "Whv, Harold, how dfl you know anything about it?" "Becawe, mamma, it said at the bottom of the window 'Job 14.10.'" Teacher (to spelling class): "Johnny, spell ' fail.' " Jobnnv : " I cant." " You can't spell that simple word? Why not?" "'Cause wu told me that there "was no such word as 'fail.'" Jolwny Rateton was a very good boy, as small boys go, but- he had one fault which it seemed impossible for his i-other to ov?r-com-e—he would fig-ht with other boys He had been reproved; and at last Johnny bad made a faithful promise that be would battle no more. Tbflt very everting be. returned from school with a cut cheek and a swollen nose: "Johnny," said hie mother, "you promised me this morning that you would not fight again." "But I haven't been fighting, ma. This is an accident." "An accident V " Yes, ma. I was sitting on Tommy Briggs, and I forgot to hold his feet."

Form Master to .Tones, who has been roproved by the bead for making a rude caricature of one of the masters): "Well, Jones, and what did the headmaster say about your funnv picture?" Jones (with d : £rnity)": "He said. sir. that nobody but the lowest of the low would call it funny."