ELECTION MINOR COMEDIES.

Evening Star, Issue 12764, 17 March 1906, Page 5

ELECTION MINOR COMEDIES.

"No," said the Rector, gravely twirling tho glass that held his post-prandia.l allowance of port; "no, I shall not vote for Grazebrook." "Why .nob?" asked Duncan, As the eldest of the family, a man who had been at Oxford five terms, and had once spoken (very lato in the evening) at the Union, he considered himself more than a match for the poor old governor. "Because," stated the Rector, "he ha*. expressed himself hi favor of the, disestablishment and disendowment of the Church. A little more port, Mamma?" Mamma shook her head She would not have interrupted the conversation for worlds. .How very handsome Duncan looked in his new dress sirit!

"I think you're wrong," pronounced the youth. "Li fact, ail the old-fashioned—-that is to say, the old school of Tories are mistaken with regard to disendowment." " Perhaps the young school will put us right," suggested the Rector. "Well, the tlhing is extremely simple. You are very fond, you know, of describing disendWmemb as "robbery."

"There is no other word for it." " No?" Duncan, with the cwr of one who has his opponent at bis mercy, leaned forward and lit a cigarette. "Tell me," he continued, "can one be a robber if one merely takes, that- which belongs to one?" ("W"hat a lot of 'ones,'" whispered Dorothy to Barbara. Barbara giggled, because it always tickled her ear when people whispered ioto it.) "I fear I donft quite see your point," sard the Rector.

"Well," Duncan: explained, 'ignoring tJbe by-play of his foolish sisters, "if tie State' disendows the Qhureh, it is merely taking what belongs to it." " Rubbish, my dear boy. Whena did you learn that?"

"That is merely the view of the leading authorities. I wish you wouldn't be silly Barbara!"

"The Church," observed the Rector kindly, " has been very largely endowed by private individuals. ,Do you mean to tell me that that money belongs to the State?" " Certainly, All money. belongs to the

" I see. Now, suppose we take a. similar case in secular matters. At the beginning of .each, term, I place to your credit at the Old Bank the sum of one hundred pounds. What would you say if I came up in tie middle of the term and- took that money away in a hahdhag?" v j. _■ Ihmcan hesitated. Dorothy busied herself with a prune. Barbara stuffed a handkerchief jnto her month, - " One. cant discuss these things before a pack, of giggling schoolgirls," said Duncan. And he stalked! out of the room. * * » * *

"Iharo only to add, ladies and gentlemen, that if you' do me the very great, honor of sending me to Westminster as your representative it will be my great and constant endeavor to forward the ,3randi Cause that. each, one of us present in this room to-night has at heart —I mean, of course, the Cause of the poor, the suffering, the down-trodden; the Cause of those who have not the strength, or the means, ot the opportunity to fight for themselves."—{Loud! cheers, in which the agent joined.) The meeting had been, an enormous success. There was not the least doubt of it. Mr Bee leaned from the window of the carriage and grinned at anybody, libs Bee did the some at? the other window.

A Voice—strangely Eke that of the agent —cried: "Take out the horses, lads J Lefs poll %n home!" Unfortunat ty, the coachman, whipped up at that moment, so that the sycophantic hatcher had roach ado to saw© hoa toea.

Mr Bee's house was'two miles the town: He lay back' against the cushions X"ss of the hired brougham, luxuriating, „' memories of" the evening. Th**ihistWgto' i '' / v3Ji flew to the future. A. seat in, the House V y*fl A reputation, for fearless speaking 1 confidence of his chiefs! A member of tibe /• $ Government! A member of the Cabitteti 4 '*' \* Prime ■ * • £ , Bump I They had pulled up with, a jeric , **' "<■ before his desirable and commodious xwb-' denoe. . , " f? " Why don't thev open the door?" asked Mr Bee. "I didn't take the key." ' /*• "I don't suppose they're home yet, dar- ""- ling." . ' s -. (The hired' brougham was rumbling back ? to tie town.) "Home? What do you. mean?" "All the ma'ds are you know. I ' , told them they might go to the meeting/* v " What on earth forf' " I thought it would 100k 1 well, especially as you wene going to make such a point , •>• of the oqualitv of the classes. I hope T » " I must- pay, Annies, you do sillier thinga than any woman. I ever met. Nowiwe've got to "wait on the doorstep until those blessed servants turn up." "I'm awfully sorry, darling. I think W " "~" cam find the key of the back door, though. i Cook generally leaves it inside the dog kennel." ' "Not muchr said Mr Bee. "I knowthat dog." It began to ram. Tbe'candidtofce allowed himself an impai&amentary word. Social-, ism, like Mr Bee, had come homo to roost. s # * * ♦ * > The Great Ladies left their carriage at %• the end of the street. They were anxioas to avoid anything that might savor of .-. ostentation. They were very beautiful, and their man.- , ners were most charming. No matter how poor the house, or how dirty, they went a full yard over the tferesL-i. When, they came across a nice clean baby they kissed it; the dirty babies had to be content with • a radiant smite. The last house on> the right-hand side rather frightened them. The front door stood wide-open, but they • -' could see nobody within. Across the window of the bedroom, a ragged oonoterpano had been pinned. The third knock brought an answer. The woman l of the house came down the stairs and stood in the middle of the room, Marin?. She was white, and thm, and sufien-tookmg. ■•' Oh, good afternoon,'? one of the ladies began. . " May we come in if you're not very busy? Wewontkeep you a moment." "What d'yer want?" Horrid woman! She must have been drinking. Now they came to thank of it, there was certainly an odor of spirits—gin, they pupposed. "We just wanted to ask yon whether your husband has promised bis vote to anybody yet. We're canvassing, you know, fot Sir " : - "What voter Such terrible ignorance? Bat th» Great Ladies were not astonished. They weue experienced canvassers. " For Parliament, you know. The poU- • ingNiii this division takes place on Tuesday,* , . and we're so anxious " The woman interrupted them with a laugh—not a nice laugh; a laugh that made the Great Ladies shiver. Really, one came across strange people at election times. Suddenly she stepped forward, "Aw yon good sorts?" she asked. "We Would you V "Give me a sovereign. It ain't fer meself." " We should be delighted, only, of course, we're not supposed to give money topeople. that we call upon about votes, you know. Otherwise " "My man's in quod, and if 'e wasn't 'e wouldn't be no use to yer. I'll show you what I wont it for. Came upstairs. You needn't be afraid." They hesitated, and looked at on© another. Then, being women, they went. She led them to' the room across the window of which the ragged counterpane had V;'.. been pinned. On a bed in the comer lay a tiny, tiny bundle. It did not move. The woman drew aside the sheet.—London 'Daily Maii.'