Things a Baby Can Do.
It can beat any alarm clock ever invented for waking a family up in the morning. Give it a fair chance, and it can smash more dishes than the most industrious servantgirl in the country. It can fall down oftener and with less provocation than the most expert tumbler in a circus ring. It can make more genuine fuss over a pin than its mother would over a broken leg. It can choke itself till it is black in the face with greater ease than the most accomplished wretch that ever was executed. It can keep a family in constant turmoil from morning till night and night till morning without once varying its tune. It can be relied upon to sleep peacefully all day when its father is at business, and cry all night when he is particularly sleepy. Itmay bethe naughtiest, ugliest, most fretful baby in the world; but you can never make its mother believe it, and you had better not try it. It can be a charming and model infant when no one is by; but when visitors are present it can exhibit more bad temper than both of its parents together. It can brighten up a house better than all the furniture ever made, make sweeter music than the finest orchestra organised, fill a larger space in the parents' breast than they knew they had, and when it goes away it can cause a greater vacancy and leave a greater blank than all the rest of the world put together*
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https://paperspast.natlib.govt.nz/newspapers/ESD18871105.2.28.13
Bibliographic details
Evening Star, Issue 7361, 5 November 1887, Page 2 (Supplement)
Word Count
259Things a Baby Can Do. Evening Star, Issue 7361, 5 November 1887, Page 2 (Supplement)
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