To a Man Who Would Marry.

Evening Star, Issue 7355, 29 October 1887, Page 1 (Supplement)

To a Man Who Would Marry.

Select the girl. Agree with the girl’s father in politics and her mother in religion. If you have a rival, keep an eye on him ; if he’s a widower, keep two eyes on him. Don’t swear to the girl that you have no bad habits. It will be enough for you to say that you have never heard yourself snore in your sleep. Don’t put much stuff on paper. If you do, you will hear it read in after years, when jour wife has some special purpose in inflicting upon you the severest punishment known to a married man. Go home at a reasonable hour in the evening. Don’t wait until the girl has to

throw her whole soul into a (Ji® can’t cdver with bbßlbaiidfi., sUWp'thiOg : like that might datfce a coolness w the very beginning of the game, o If yorf sit down on some molasses candy' that little Wfflie has left on the (hair, while wearing your new smatner trousers for the first time, smile sweetly, and remark' that you don’t mind sitting an molasses candy 'at all, and that “boys will be boys. Reserve your true feelings lor futurereference. ~ If, on the occasion of your first call, the girl upon whom yon have placed your young - affections looks like an iceberg and acts like a cold wave, take your leave early and stay away. Woman in her hours of freeze' fe uncertain, coy, and bard to please. . In cold weather finish saying good-night in the house. Don’t stretch it all along the way to Jhe front gate, and thus lay the foundation for future asthma, bronchitis, neuralgia, and chronic catarrh, to help yon to worry the girl to death after she has married yon. . Don’t lie about your financial condition. It is very annoying to a bride who has pictured for herself a life of luxury in your ancestral hails to learn too late that y6n expect her to ask a bald-headed parent, who has been uniformly kind to her, to take you in out of the cold.