POSTSCRIPTS

Evening Post, Volume CXL, Issue 52, 30 August 1945, Page 6

POSTSCRIPTS

Chronicle and Comment

j BY PERCY FLAGE "I do not call the Japanese 'Japs,' because that sounds too familiar for" such dirty people."—Winston Churchill. * * "* Did you know that John Gully, famous prize-fighter, won the Derby three times with his horses and became M.P. for Pontefract? « * * Overii-ard on the radio after the VJ celebrations: "This concludes the national hiccup—l mean, hook-up. Stations may resume their own pro--grammes." After that the hang-over.-FACT. * * » INFORMATION. Apparently there are Banaghers and Banaghers. Samuel Lovers, in "Irish Legends," tells of one who outwitted the Devil. "He beats Banagher and Banagher beat the Devil." Can Col. 8 tell us who beats Banagher? Atta boyl Yours for the cause. SNAKE GULLY. * * * "AIRBRASIVE." A new method of drilling teeth, in, which a stream of compressed air re--places the conventional drill, eliminating pain, heat, and vibration, is disclosed by the American Dental A-S so cis_ i on Called "a'irbrasive," the process, developed by Dr. Robert Black, of Corpus Christi (Texas) uses an almost pinpoint of compressed air, into which a finely-divided abrasive agent is introduced. * * * SECURITY . . . ADVENTURE. An American critic has said that "if there had been a Beveridge Plan in England in Queen Elizabeth's time there would have been no Drake, no Hawkins, no Raleigh." With all respect—what nonsense and what bad history. Hawkins came of a wellestablished family of ship owners. Drake, his kinsman, was captain of a ship at 22. Raleigh was a son of a country gentleman,' who, though of reduced estate, was able to send his son as a commoner to Oxford. None of those three great men of Devon was bred in want; all had social security from birth. Adventure comes not from the half-starved but from those who are well-fed enough to feel ambition. Good distribution of income to meet the most urgent needs first is wanted! whether we are rich or poor. . —Sir William Beveridge. * * * SHOPGIRL. Amid the rejoicing and thankfulness that the war has ended, the following thoughts occur to me: — Now that the war has ended, And supplies will be coming back, I'm going to get that shopgirl, And jolly well give her the sack. She told me "No elastic," "Silk stockings? Oh, we've none!" And when I ordered 12 large eggs, She said, "Sorry, only one." She cut down on my butter, Tea, meat, and sugar as well, And when I asked for chewing guM She hadn't any to sell. I tried to get cigarettes— ; No, she hadn't any supplies. Well, could I get a' hot water bottlef ; No, they didn't stock my size. '•■ So I'm going back to see her, k And if she dares to say no, I'll squash her as I used to be squashed. "There's a Peace on now, you know.** J.M.D. Motueka. * ' * * "UP, GUARDS, AND AT 'EM!" Dear Percy Flage,—Pardon me if I "butt-in" for a moment or two in the controversy between "Adamic" and "L.D.A." on the atomic theory. "L.D.A." facetiously remarks that the. credit of originating the atomic theory belongs to the Duke of Wellington when he gave the order, "Up, Guards, and at 'em!" Just so,' and very nicely put. But the Duke of Wellington never gave that order. The Iron Duke during his lifetime denied on more than one occasion that he ever uttered the expression attributed to him. However, it is a very popular error, so we must pardbn "L.D.A." for his little lapse and congratulate him on his bright and. breezy paragraph. There has been so much myth and illusion woven around Waterloo that even Wellington himself has said: "After reading sundry accounts of Waterloo I am almost tempted to believe that I was not there myself." J.A.W. Pahiatua.