POSTSCRIPTS

Evening Post, Volume CXXXVIII, Issue 23, 27 July 1944, Page 4

POSTSCRIPTS

Chronicle and Comment

8Y PERCY FLAGE

! Corporal F. BilloAvs, of the R.C.A.F. in North Africa, has written his parents a letter five feet in length, and written on both sides of the paper. 5S * * "And lioav are you getting on at school, Jimmy?" "Oh, fine! I'm learning words of four cylinders now." H.W.V.: As a vegetarian, Bernard ShaAV supposes he Avill live for ever. Let us hope for posterity that it is strong and brave, and preferably a little deaf. BOY BUYS BEER. A ten-year-old boy, accused at Durham, England, of stealing three bicycles, Avas stated to have sold two of them for 23 shillings and spent the money on beer. The Magistrate's clerk: Ginger beer? f The boy's mother: No; ordinary beer. The lad Avas fined 5s and ordered to pay 30s costs. •::- _ * DAZZLED. A caolured German officer Avas telling an* American Avar correspondent: "German soldiers fight for the Fatherland, and there is no distinction in the German mind between the Father- i land and the Fuhrer." A German soldier sitting next to the officer, and listening to the conversation, winked, and 'the correspondent smiled. The soldier immediately became solemn and looked aAvay. The German officer was frowning at him. * ♦ * MOTOR-CAR PIONEER. Britain's number one motorist is dead. Mr. F. R. Sirnms, founder of the Royal-Automobile Club, first man in Britain to drive a car—the man, in fact, Avho coined, the words "motorcar" and "petrol"—died, 80 years old. Frederick Richard Simms, engineer, devoted his life to the cause of the car. All his life he campaigned for it. He founded the R.A.C. in 1897, the Society of Motor Manufacturers and Traders in 1902. Ten years ago he erected his oivn memorial in Chislehurst Parish Churchyard and bought the ground which Avould one day hold his dust. There, beside his wife, his ashes will be buried. * ■>:■ * MAME McCLANCY. What shall we 'ave for mornin' tea, Becos it's my Bill's berthday, see. 'E couldn't come with us, ole dear, 'Aven to work both far-'n'-near, And' if ,'e didn't there's a chance Uv gettin' 'it up on 'e's pance. In any case 'e's bound to 'aAvl The lads in to the pub an' call An' shout "'ere's 'ow, a nother too," As real blokes orfen like to do. They'll drink Bill till 'e 'ates to go, Fillin' them glasses, as you know. They jest won't care a rap 'oav long If Bill gets started on a song, An' I Avon't 'urt 'im when 'e comes ... What should be first, aear, nails or -; thums? . "LION CITY." Present-day Lwoav is (or was) . prosperous, modern, and attractive city. But, if the greatest part of the city is modern, its centre—from which, tlie new town gradually developed— is many centuries old. Many of the buildings are so old that their floors are several feet below street level, and the Avails slope outwards at their base, in the style of the late Middle Ages. Probably the most attractive feature of old Lavoav is the predominance of copper roofs. Tlie newer parts of the toiAm include some fine buildings of more recent origin, amongst them a large university and some interesting museums. Lwoav Avith 330,000 inhabitants is Poland's third largest city, but in many branches of science it leads before Warsaw and CracoAA*.