CHRISTMAS GIFTS of LONG AGO

Evening Post, Volume CXXVI, Issue 150, 22 December 1938, Page 19 (Supplement)

CHRISTMAS GIFTS of LONG AGO

THE "custom \of giving presents at Christmas time dates from very early days. When Norman William reigned in England we read that the citizens of Gloucester presented him every Christmas with an enormous lamprey pie. As lampreys were worth more than a guinea each, the present was a very handsome one.

All the Plantagenet Kings accepted gifts from their subjects. The first Edward received from his nobles one Christmas morning "a large gilt ewer, set with pearls all over, a comb and lookingglass of silver gilt, a bodkin of silver in a leather case, and a pair of large knives, studded with gold." He also received from the King of France an elephant, "a most strange beast, and wonderful to the English people, since never had anything of that kind been seen before." The sheriffs of Loridon had orders to build at once a house 40ft by 20ft for this curious Christmas gift. His son, Edward 11, revelled in costly food and -clothes, so it is not surprising to read that on the v first Christmas Day of his reign he received fourteen heads of peacocks for pies, twelve white satin tunics, and eighteen coloured tunics embroidered, with gold and silver.

When Mary Tudor began to reign, the novelty of a woman on the throne suggested great possibilities to her subjects. The first Christmas Day she was given,.; among other presents, a crystal cup, three gilt bowls, gloves, sugar loaves, a turkey hen, a good fat goose, a capon, two swans, a flagon

of rose water, six barrels of figs, and a richlypainted table. These gifts rapidly decreased as the ill-starred Queen's popularity waned, but when Queen Elizabeth ascended the throne her-Christmas presents attained an almost historic importance Every year she received large sums of money, caskets studded with precious stones, costly necklaces and bracelets, embroidereC gowns, petticoats, and smocks, silk stockings, and a variety of other ornaments. In 1574, her favourite, the Earl of Leicester, gave her a wonderful fan of white feathers set in a handle of gold, one side garnished with emeralds^

She: You say I'm the most beautiful, divine, and gorgeous creature irx the whole world? Are you trying to kid me? He: No, I'm trying to kiss you. "I suppose," said the old lady, "you are a properly qualified chemist?" - "Yes, madam." "You've never poisoned anyone by mistake?" "Not to my knowledge." She heaved a sigh of relief. "Very well, then; you can give me a pennyi worth of cough-drops." Magistrate: Why didn't you go to the assistance of the plaintiff in the fight? Policeman: I didn't know which was going to be the plaintiff. He had been to a Christmas Eve celebration, and arriving home in the early hours of the morning, he wondered how he could get upstairs without waking his wife. Finally 4ie had a brilliant idea. Tying the fire-irons round his neck, he began his ascent, chuckling to himself: — "She'll never hear me with all this bloomin' noise going on." > "Now that you are through college, what are you going to do?" one of the youth's relatives asked. ' "I shall study medicine and become a great surgeon," replied the youth. "The medical profession is pretty crowded already, isn't it?" ventured the relative. "Can?t help that/ snapped the youth. "I shall study medicine, and those who are already in the profession will have to take their chance, that's aIL" '■■* ~

and the other with rubies and diamonds. Sir Francis Drake also gave her a fan of red and white feathers, the handle of gold having her Majesty's picture within it, framed with diamonds and seed pearls. Lord Howard presented her with a jewel of gold, representing ' a cat with " mice playing

round her; and from other courtiers she received ■- a flower of gold, garnished with diamonds, rubies, . and opals; and a pearl pendant with devices painted upon it.

When the Stuarts came to England, this practice of giving presents was' continued. In 1605,, Prince Henry presented to his father a Latin poem in

M. L. Stollard

hexameter* verse inscribed on parchment; to his mother, a pearl necklace; and to his little sister, Princess Elizabeth, a cabinet of ivory wrought in silver. This seems a strange present for a tiny girl in the nursery, yet not so strange as the "two fat oxen," which she received from the citizens of Gloucester. Doubtless her Christmas gifts in later years would be more to her taste, when the Prince Palatine presented her with a rich chain of dia^ monds and two pendant pearls. He also gave the King some gold and silver plate, to the Queen a string of emeralds and rubies, and to Prince Henry a gold rapier and a pair of spurs.

We bear little of children and their presents la these old times, when toy shops were unknown. But we do know that toy horses and lambs "with, red ribands round their necks," drums, balls, trumpets, and gaily-coloured windmills were sold in the streets of London. A fifteenth-century writer gives us a very pretty, picture of little Prince Edward, afterwards the ill-fated Edward' V, playing in Windsor Park one Christmas Day with a» "right faire hobbie horse of painted wood" which the King his father had given him that morning, and a portrait of Lady Arabella Stuart shows her holding a very elaborately dressed wooden doll.

A sailor went dashing down the float to a boat just as if^was pulling out. The boat had moved off three or four yards, and he jumped and fell, hitting the back of his head. For several minutes he lay stunned. When he came to, the boat was several hundred yards from shore. He looked back, blinked a time or two, and shouted:— "Boy! Oh, boy; can I jump?" The school inspector was examining the class. Suddenly he pointed to little Tommy and said*, "Can you make up a sentence containing the word 'gruesome'?" "Oh, yes, sir," replied Tommy. "My father stopped shaving and 'gruesome' whiskers!" "If a child were to come in and say her mother had sent her for a can of maltreated milk, what would you give her?" asked the dairyman of his new assistant. "Why, malted milk, of course." : "Fine. Our last man hunted all over the place for a can of whipped cream." The miserable looking man shook his head sadly. "See that plot of land over there?" he said to his companion. "Last year I could have bought it i for a mere song. It's now worth over twenty pounds a foot." , "I suppose you couldn't sing?" said his friend, lightly enough. The other gazed vacantly at the land. "H'm," he said, "I could sing all right, but I couldn't get the right notes." Teacher: Parse the sentence, "John married Mary." , Tommy: John's a noun because he's the naoM of something. Married is a conjunction, because it joins John and Mary. Mary's a verb, because she governs the noun John.