POSTSCRIPTS

Evening Post, Volume CXVIII, Issue 33, 8 August 1934, Page 8

POSTSCRIPTS

Chronicle and Comment

BY PERCY FLAGE

Definition. Chaos: Something that will happen if the other party gets into office.

Cattle niay>have the same feelings as human beings, but they certainly aro lacking 1 in, horso sense.

If there, is anything iv a name, Duckfield- and Clay, of the Glamorgan team, should shine .on a sticky wicket. "

They know their business. Two storks have, built their nest on the roof ' of the provincial maternity hospital at Tnsterberg, yEast Prussia. » ■»■.■■ « ■ ■ ■'

WITHOUT .COMMENT. Here is an advertisement , froni »n .American metropolitan.- daily:— ■ ■'■ BULLET HOLES BE WOVEN PERFECTLY ■'■ In Damaged Clothes—Low Price. Also Burns, Moth Holes, and Teara. - Invisible Textile Weavers,' 32 N. State Street. Band. 9009. The city was' Chicago—ofo—of course^

STOPPING THINGS. Ah, Mrs. Hicks, It' me find you Was M.l'.s, setting in tlio Housi1, Our polities Would soon make work And stop ilils grouse. Yes! Mir. Brown. Tlic way Iliey mess about', Il.'s shocking. Then, bonding down, Slip licked :i. linger and adroitly stopped A "ladder" in her stocking. . M. SIBKON. '■■ * *■ GOLD. If that Maryborough whore the 112o» nugget was found is the Victorian town of that name the news comes scarcely as a surprise. Fortunes hava been made, and lost, in that one-tunu flourishing mining centre. Not morn than twenty-five years ago a bank clerk, whoso job did not agree with his health, resigned, bought a pick and, shovel, a wash dish, and some etceteras, and began poking about some of tho worn-out claims .on tho outskirts of Maryborough. • Ho made tucker and smokes, working the tailings at tha mine heads for three months. One day, scratching in a hole about 12ft deep, he unearthed a pocket which contained three nuggets weighing respectively nine, four, and two and a half ounces, plus sonio coarse, shotty; gold. It was common enough after substantial rain in the district to "speck"' gold on tho roads on which spoil from the mining dumps had been used asfilling. •::- * * THEEE BLACK CROWS. Howdy, "Saige"! When tho trans-* port Arawa docked at Colon late in 1919 the first troops to storm tho town, were a large draft of linibloss diggers. 'Now, swinging' an artificial leg in mild weather is not so pleasant, Jbut with a tomperaturo hitting the high spots it becomes very thirsty work. It was not surprising, then, that after a hectic day tho; boys should adjourn to a cafe to cooi off. Certainly, the "iced beor was at first refreshing, but as the ovening wore on-its effect on all was apparent. Among the last to leave wero a trio of "limbies." Each wore a Yank cap, a cigar in mouth, and slung round tho shoulders were bunches of bananas. After wandering in circles, they wero collected by the picket, bundled aboard, a gharry, and .dispatched to tho waterfront. As they stumbled along the dock towards tho ship, "Curly" came to grief. His dud leg stuck, and bananas became a tangled heap, and ho took a neat header down a coal dump. In" no uncertain manner his two pals slid down to help him up. After much crawling, hauling, and climbing they eventually reached the top. Covered from head to foot in coal dust, they_ came1 staggering up tho gangway sing: ing, "Don't Go Down tho Mine, Digger; Let it Come/Up toTou." VDIG." "VVEVEL. .1 * s '*.■ # THE CHANGING OF THE GUAKD, (With apologies to Mr. Milne.) They're changing guard at the Big "New Bank — 1 You may think1 it a pieco of swank; But a banker's lifo is terrible hard And he needs the support of a Bi£ Brave Guard; Say the warders. They've changing guard at the Big Now Bank, Tho men .whom the country ought toj v thank; They march up and down for the peaco of our souls, But "We've no Sergeant to mend 0115 holes," Say tho Warders. They've changing guard at the Bi| New Bank— ~ " Don't fancy it's just .1 childish prank!, They've neither parties nor yet the grounds, ' But "We walk upon millions and millions of pounds," Say the warders. They're changing guard at the Big New Bank, Guarding the cheques which are far, from blank. You may gaze on them as they niarclit to and ,fro, But "Not on the faco^ of / Monsiouc Lefenux!" Say the warders. They're changing guard, at the Big New Bank, Squadron by squadron and rank by ; rank. Do you think they'll havo any notes for me? "Well, that remains for us to see!" fc>;iy tho warders. t K. M. MACASEILL. Wellington.

' MOBE STKANGE SURVIVALS. These details wore forwarded bj\ "Lex," an ex-law student now twanging the "banjo"'-on relief work. They; refer to the systejn of quit rents, ;i feudal custom. still operating in England and Scotlaud. Quit rents are so called becauso they acquit a tenant of all obligations and dues to the manor lord. Every year the late Duke of Wellington used to present a small tricolour flag to tho King as a quit rent for the Strathiieldsaye estate. The flag is one of many such quit rents which tho Sovereign is entitled to exact from his , subjocts, Other famous ones are: Tho flag presented by the Duke of Marlborough in payment for Blenheim Palace on August 15, the anniversary of the battle.. The Duke of Atholl'e white rose, given to the King whenever ,ho visits Blair Atholl. The Marquis of Ailesbury's ivory cup, given to tho King whenever he hunts in Savernake Forest —said to bo the 'only forest held by a private individual.' Scotland abounds . in similar instances of quit rents and service rents—relics of feudal days. These include three blasts on a buglo „ (Buckstone Bock Estate) and a bucket* i'ul of snow (Joule's Castlo, Rosshhe). Formerly ii tenure of the old castle, of Saiichiomuir was conditional on tin* owner providing a glass of her favourite wine every New Year's T3vc for th<| ghost of James l^VgraiMlniotUe-r!