POSTSCRIPTS

Evening Post, Volume CXVII, Issue 146, 22 June 1934, Page 8

POSTSCRIPTS

BY PERCY FLAGE

Chronicle and Comment

One of the obstacles:to recovery i» the States is that protagonists of th> Deal refuse to put all their cards on the table. . ." • ♦ '■■•.■ As S. S. Kirsten, who has entered, a Sport Scion for the centenary air race, is short of a pilot, what about Jean Batten? * ♦ ' '. * '. You can stagger home at any old o'clock tomorrow morning and get away with it: you have been listening .in to the Test broadcast. TO DATE; THAT IS; Though it may, Iji a way, . . • ' ,; Ruffle up Bradman's* pride, Stau McCabe, They-all say, Is the don of his side. •■' "-;•■.■ • •..' . - THE CANNY CELT. ; It has been suggested that w» try this one on "our clients:—A Welshmaa received his income tax demand for the first time. He went through the papers minutely and replied: "After carefully perusing your prospectus I have decided not-to join your association." , •.. : :. \ ' ':"-.■'■■♦:•■ •;■• *.. » ' SUPERANNUATED EX-MONAECHS. Flage,—Following up .that note of yours on State allowances to Royalties out of a job. The ex-Maharajah of Indore i« in-receipt of £75,000 a year, and the ex-Khedive of Egypt, the only professional banker among fallen monarchs, has to scratch along,l poor devil, on a miserable fortune ,of £,8,000,000. He ranks' among the- Rockefellers of Royalty. Another paid-off uncrowned head; the ex-Sultan and Caliph, draws £35,000 a year,-but claims £30,000,000 from Turkey, Britain, France, and Egypt. A. greedy - fellow! ~-..;..', ' -PIN MONEY. . • . .-.■' «... * ,-:.,. .■ . » .' "■". WRESTLING DRAMA. Dear Percy,—Dan the coal-man whom I get my KOLOFF bet the locar fruiterer CHARLIE SAN TEN berries be couldn't make his horse WONG BUK. Dan, however, was in DEBT 'N couldn't pay,-so said his name was. WALKER and did, a BOLT. Charlie chased him down an ALT and through a.BEY window but couldn't catch ihim. Charlie, however, says he MEYEB-range to have ME SHOW him-a hold or two to use when he meets the fellow again. His girl-friend. MAY StOS' likely will assist him. I've never seen a SHE KEENER. ' -;...••■ • ~ .';'■: .. ■'~ .'■ '\." ": ]■./ -'■ ■ J.H. ■P-S.—rThank Heaven.for the noni da plume. I can snap ; my fingers at the cabbages and other' missiles. !■ ■■ ■■■■:'- ■* . ' ''*M • ' -'• j. PLANNED ECONOMY NOTE. Planned" economies in land-derived products may work out': satisfactorily on paper, but unfortunately Nature is no arithmetician. Apparently' she has never heard of " Brains' Trusts'' and high-powered intelligence expedients of that; brand. . Observe America, v/here planned, economy in agriculture is in full swing—or, at latest, full retreat. On the. very day that tHe President signed the Bill setting a quota for beetsugar producers ; came the . announcement.that, because of drought and other ■unfavourable conditions, the beet-sugar crop .in U.S.A. ;'will-be_sp-;per cent, .doiyn. Then there;.: was. - ihe winter wheat. At official ■"difeqtjion''thousands on thousands,of,'; wheatacres were ploughed in. Then Dame Nature got in sonic fine work with a 1 scorching sun, drought) chinchbugs, grasshoppers, and dust storms, with the result that the Federal board in charge reported three weeks ago that the winter "wheat crop stood at 31,000,000 bushels less than at April 1, last. If Nature could oily be persuaded not to work entirely, outside N.R.A. or A.A.A. and their codes, instead of perversely fighting th« New Deal. '.'■'.'.' • ■■••'•' ■■■ '• ."■ . • ' .■'■•" ■'■ . A NATIONAL FLOWER FOB ■ NEW ZEALAND.. For grace and charm, the Fern is hard to -beat ... ■.-.■■ ( . .'■->.'■ ■ (Especially when worn on : All Black ;,; jerseys), , ; ■•. ;. ■But,.to be sure, a fern is not. a flower. Ifm. for the Manuka-—-I will tell you ■~ ■ why. '■'. '~..■:.-.'. . ■'. v .. 'Tis not that it is handsomer than Kpwhai— ;■. . . j•'..Kowhai that. hangs a thousand b»lls of.gold ; , .; ■'.;.' On. delicately slender, bare blaclc branches—:• ..: ' ;. ..-..•■ Nor lovelier than Clematis,.that glory* That Milky Way of starred and stain- ', -less beauty— <. ' . " . Yet Manuka is^lovely. as a. dream. In early , summer, . see its million. flowerets, ' Tiny five-petalled rounds of faultless .! ■■ form, . ~ '■■". White .tipped with pink, Kke fairy, ' apple-blossoms. ~.-. \- At all .times, .see;its evergreen leaf- . needles, ' . . Thick-massed against., the weather and the wind ; . . Crush ihem, and smell- the wild, delicious incense. ■ But ask.:the early settlers of the ■■'*-. Manuka! ■ •. • • Many a camper's bed ita brushwood made; .-:.:-'■:■■ -'-I Many 'a wall of "scrub the farm- ; yard guarded; .',■' », '.• Many an open fire, in hut or homestead, Glowed: with the peerless heat of good ■Manuka. :r •' Some bold men smoked tho Manuka, ioi T tobacco! ■ . Besides, at Christmas, when ; th» "scrub" was blooming/ . Its blossoms massed like sunset-tintsd snowdrifts, : • ■, ...;.:" The children decked the house, inside and out, . ■ With those fair clusters—could they, have done better? .- I'm for the Manuka—l have told yoi •• ■ ::why. ..' .■..'•■•.':.■.■ '■■-.- - ;■■ ■■ ■ ■■ ■ -■■-.:•-.-. A. ■. -•■. ■• .-♦. .■ :.♦ '...♦,. ■•■ NEAT TRICK. Dear Percy,—The follo^viug incident, I am assured on unimpeachable authority, is authentic. Tu-elve "good mea and true" had duly retired to consider their verdict, and as the case was a particularly glaring one, some surprise was expressed by eleven, of the said gentlemen, that the rest of 'the jury refused to bp budged from his opinion, that the accused, was not guilty., As it was- getting near lunch time, the foreman decided to notify his "Honour that they could not agree upon their verdict. The judge, in his wisdom, suggested that perhaps they would : be ■in a more agreeable frame" of mind after they had had lunch, and ordered them again to retire. After, lunch, the eleven- again resumed their attack upon: tho "dissenter," when, strange to relate,, he immediately agreed with his fellow-jurymen ; that the accused wa§ undoubtedly * "guilty." "Well, why didn't you say so before lunch l" a,sked the surprised foreman. "Because in that case, I would. have had to buy my own lunch," was the-retort,- "and the slight delay-has saved; ms that ex? perise and I get a full .day's pay instead of half a day as a juryman." I understand the foreman's reply would noi bear printing, and is accordingly omitted. - ■.....'..' :. Yours feedingly, \ . ■' •■ - Jtse.