POSTSCRIPTS

Evening Post, Volume CXVII, Issue 125, 29 May 1934, Page 6

POSTSCRIPTS

Chronicle and Comment

BY PERCY FLAGE

Presently it looks as though the JBlue Eagle -will not have a feather to fly. with.' ** - * If Dollfuss's ambitions materialise it •will be just another illustration of a little going a ; long way. * * • Nature has developed such whimsies that it would not .surprise us to hear that Klondike, and the other milk' ma- • trons in'the utterly,utter"south were* producing ice-cream o' mornings. * • ' _« You cannot longer doubt '"Roosevelt's impartiality. Along with the big steel, coal, and motor-car organisations, beauty shoppe proprietors, barbers, and pants pressers are to be permitted to set the N.R.A. at defiance. . • ' •' • \ NEW NURSERY RHYME. ' " ' How wonld the following do ifor> ft • new nursery rhyme? Said old Mother Hnbbard: . ' - - There's naught in my cupboard, My finance grows lower and lower, So my dog, I must teach, To search well on the beach Perhaps he .will find there some moa., ■ EVAH." * * * THIS ENGLISH! '' M.8.8. ' ' makes her debut in Colum* 8 with this ,one:— An Indian student, writing a letter to the superintendent of the 'tnission,desired to end with the words: "May Heaven preserve you." -Not being ■ quite -confident of taa " meaning of ."preserve," he looked up a dictionary. When the letter reached the superintendent it ended . with the words: "'And may Heaven .pickle you.** *%* ' * WHEN SMOKERS FUMED. Dear Sir,— r Does your McClancy lad* friend know that tho tobacco liabit brought, bloodshed and punishment and discord in its wake years and years and years ago? In Turkey, for instance, in -tho 17th century, there was a Sultan, Murad IV, -who should surely, be 'the toast of the evening at every; non-smokers' banquet. Well disguised^ Murad would literally smell, out the • smokers, who were regarded as •criminals of tho vilest class,- and. anyone caught in the act-was marked down for > death, and was duly slain, his corpse being displayed on the front of - tha house in which'he-had been detected. ' In Russia, too, about this time, smoking was regarded as-a deadly sin. Persistent offpnders wexe exiled to Siberia, and, their property confiscated. -As an alternative,'tho offender was punished either by having his lips slit or being mercilessly flogged. . ,- • / ' '- MILORD NICOTINE. 'NIPPON—NOT JAPAN. Japan's'lmperial Diet has decide! to change/the island Empire's name to Nippon. •' 'Nippon" is the way the Japanese—paTdon, Nipponese—pror nounce two ideographs,"meaning "stud* and "origin.*' A free translation is "born of-the sun," or," by only a slight transition, '-'land of the rising sun." Long agitation for' the change Unallyj Teached an apes in Parliament when both major, parties, of the House of Representatives adopted absolutions favi ouring it. Thereupon it was referred to'?/the committee'for .investigation ot the'national'1 language/ which .functions in the. Ministry of Education. The,,sayants, in a unanimous verdict for" ''Nippon.'/ An order for its adoption' th'en was "sent to all branches of tn'e Government,; particularly ,to >the Foreign 'Ministry, where. use.of the English "Japan" or French, ' "Japon" haß 'been customary in cops resjKindence with Occidental- Govern-" ments. It is said, that "Japan" derived from Marco Polo's loose pronunciation of .-the .Chinese name for her -neighbour, "zhihi-pan," which be-< came in the Venetian's ■ mouth: "Zipangu." • - 1 * - -, ♦ ♦ i A PRIVATE PLAN. ("With Apologies to "W.,6. Gilbert.) Coates: -No, George, it cannot be. I don't'.think much of Socialism, but coa« trasted with Capitalism.'it is comparatively honest. No, George, I shall live and clie a Planner. Song:— Rt. Hon. J. G. Coates. Ob. better to live and die Under the'brave red flag iTfly, 'Than play a Capitalistic part ' With Socialistic head and heart. Away from, the'ehating world go I, Only to come back by and by; . , For the first time since my career bega» I've "really got a private plan. ' For I have a*private plan. His personal staff: You have! Hurrah for his private plan! Coates: Apd I,am", I am a wonderful nian, " . , I have a private plan. ' Staff: Hurrah! Hurrah for,-his private plan!" ' ■ ■ • i Goates: I'm staying down at Waiho" Gorge The details of this plan ,to-forge. I have made more mistakes 'tis'truej Than a Finance Minister ought to doj, But as years roll on /and I get older^' And here in the snow my feet get , ' colder, , A realise truth in the saying deep,-' ■ Always look before you leap, So now I've a private plan! Staff: You havel Hurrah for his private plan! Cpates: And I.am, I am, a wonderful man I have a private plan. , Staff:. He is! Hurrah for his private plant i I ' D.P. • *. * ♦ SEARCHLIGHT.ON STALIN. " ' Litvinoff is a clever fellow, but Stalint is top of the class. KyriH Kakabadse, now "wanted" by the-Soviet, formerly] a soldier and administrator of high, rank, and until recently manager of thel Georgian Soviet Manganese Orei.Trusfc at Berlin, speaks the truth. Kakabadss worked with Stalin for twenty years, and has developed a low opinion of the man y who governs, the lives of 170,000,000 people. Lenin lived in tha quiet manner of a simple (?) Commun-. ist in a few roojns in the Kremlin. Hid successor has chosen for himself th«. vast apartments occupied by Ivan tha| Terrible. Ho has a 30,000-acre estatei outside Moscow which is called Zuba-t lovka. In Georgia he has still another) estate, his mother living in a large honse nearby. Kakabadse ' describes^ Stalin in these words: "He is a thick-i x set fellow with a pock-marked face, and all else that you notice about him.isi his slock, drooping moustaebe and whp.l, Lenin" used to call Miis little monkey) eyes.'," His life used to be wild—his father was a dipsomaniac—but he has steadied-up in the last three year** Btahn always travels by night—his far*, ourite car a Rolls Boycc. Two big car* go ahead of him, and two more follow Each of the pair has searchlights instead of ordinary headlights,-, an 9 Stalin's car is practically'in the dark.' According to Kakabadse it costs Russia £300,000 a year to maintain Stalin jn the state in which he chooses to live—» but that sounds like one of those cables from Riga. Stalin's late wife i 6 de* scribed as a swoet and gentle lady whaj tried unavailingly to soften- the- rutln lessness of her husband." " *