SPOILED THE SALE.

Evening Post, Volume CXVII, Issue 65, 17 March 1934, Page 18

SPOILED THE SALE.

Shoe Salesman: - Here's a good strong pair, six; last-you a lifetime. • = Customer? Good.. -That's the. kind .of thing I've been, looking for. I'll .take those. Shoe_ Salesman: Thank you, sir. Will one pair be enough? - The burglar effected an entrance into the bank. • %He found the way to the strongroom. -Whan the light, from the' lantern fell on the door he- saw the sign:— "Save your dynamite' The safe is not | locked. Turn the knob and open." j For a moment he ruminated. "Anyway, there's no harm:in trying it, if it1 really is unlocked." He grasped the knob and > turned. Instantly the office was flooded with light, an alarm bell rang loudly, an electric shock rendered him helpless, while'k door in the wall opened and a bulldog" rushed out and seized hini. "I know what's wrong with me," he1 sighed an hour later, when the cell door closed upon him.- "I've too much faith in human nature. I'm too trusting." A convivial soul found himself at 2 a.m. alone in the smoking-room of his hotel. Suddenly he conceived the idea that it was his duty to read the personal column of 'The Times." He appeared immensely struck with" an advertisement, which read: "An .'- 'officer about to go to 'Central Africa on a bisgame hunting expedition would1 like to meet with a companion to accompany him. Apply: Colonel Blank, etc." Donning his hat and coat, he' wobbled in the direction of the address given. At-last, with difficulty, he discovered the house and rang the bell. A ljead appeared at an unper window. "Say, ol' man," shouted the convivial one, "are you the fellah' who's goin' biggame huntin'?" v "Yes," came the reply. "Well, old egg, I ■thought I'd hop alons to say I'm sorry I can't come .with you." "Two bob for a, tip to the waiter? That's a' bit generous, isn't it?" "Perhaps, yes-^-but. then look, at the lovely overcoat he's given me!" Professional boxer • (_to dustman, who called for Christmas box): Called for your Christmas box. have ye? Well, have'ye brought the gloves? Solicitor: Was there any evasion on Mr. Smith's '■ part when you presented the bill? Plaintiff: Xo, sir. Only on my part, and I had to dodge very, quickly. "J. adore that-selection from' Beethoven; it is a melody that haunts me," said the amateur pianist after a very poor attempt at playing a classic: % "And no wonder," whispered one listener to another.."She murdered it; so she deserves to have it haunting her."