CRICKET STORIES.

Evening Post, Volume LX, Issue 102, 27 October 1900, Page 1 (Supplement)

CRICKET STORIES.

» A correspondent of an Australian paper suggests- a- method of getting out a stonewall cricketer. He writes: — The method I would suggest is strictly lawful, but not exactly sportsmanlike ; but then, the atonewaller's tactics, though strictly lawful, are equally unsportsmanlike. My advice to the bowler is : Bowl a slow, underhand ball, very, very high in the air, so as to let the ball 'drop "'from the skies", right on Mr. Stonewaller's bails. Ere long Mr. S. will be bowled. Try it, and — have one or two fielders standing close in. A funny catch may come 'off. Pearson's Weekly tells an amusing story of a village umpire. A match was being played where local rivalry ran high. A butcher of the village came in , to bat, and before he bagan was , seen, to whisper in the umpire's ear: — "Don't thee give me out afore I've got four, old chap, and there's a quid for thee," said he. The umpire laughed, and said jokingly, "All right." The first ball the man had was appealed for by the wicket-keeper for a catch, but was disallowed to the batsman's evident pleasure, who thought the umpire was indeed with him. The next bail he hit for four, and as it was thrown in smartly, it hit the wicket ; but the batsman was quite in his ground. Nevertheless, he made tracks xor the tent immediately. "Here," said the umpire as he was passing, "you aren't out?' "I know it lad," said the other; "but doesn't tha see? I bet old Billy Jones, on th' other side, a five-pound note I'd geb four, and tha can bet I'm after the i live pounds afore Billy goes away?" , And he wont. Whether that umpire got his "quid" or not history doth not record. The truth of the following little story is vouched for. It- should prove- particularly interesting to those readers who revel in simple mathematical catches arid conundrums: — "Here, Jack Wright," exclaimed n little j Dimmy one night at practice, "you're not half the player you think you are. You want a bit of the 'swell' taking" out of your head, and I'm the man to do it. I'll play you at single wicket, and"-r-bombastically — "I'll bet drinks and cigars round that 1 make at least three times as many runs as you in a single innings. • "Done!" replied Wright. "Hurrah ! hurrah ! ! hurrah ! ! !" exclaimed the rest of the fellows; and, amid much laughter and good-humoured banter, all was ready for the great event. Then Dimmy tried to laugh away tha affair as a huge joke, but neither | Wright nor the other fellows would hear of it. The fact is, Dimmy was by no I means in earnest when he challenged Wright. He knew well enough, as- every one else^on the field knew, that Wright, the crack first-eleven batsman, was worth a dozen of little Dimmy, whose prowess as a cricketer may be fairly gauged from the fact that he was usually chosen as reserve for the second eleven. More for the fun of the thing than anything else, the men who were' on the field determined that Dimmy should go through with the thing, and that there . should be a fight to a. finish. It really was unkind of Wright, though,' to accept Dimmy's challenge so promptly. Volunteers for fielding were speedily forthcoming, and two reliable umpires were selected. Both, combatants agreed to accept the decisions of the umpires on all points as final and binding. Wright won the toss, and elected to bat first. ; Before bowling a single ball little Dimmy suddenly resolved to try the effect of diplomacy. He figuratively hoisted a flag of truce, and signified Ms desire to parley with his doughty antagonist. With Kmger-like simplicity and' subtlety, he suggested that the match should be abandoned as a draw, and that each of the combatants should claim a great moral victory. The umpires would not hear of such a thing, and then the battle began. To the surprise of the fielders, to the dismay of Wright, and to the indescribabiy-exU-berant delight of little Dimmy, the giant "crack" was cleaned bowled first ball. Dimmy's innings ! The little man, with a light heart and a heavy bat, smote tho first ball he received with mighty vigour, but, unfortunately for him, he smote it straight into the hands of the bowler, who held the catch. Both batsmen had scored tho hated 0. Then the fun began. Wright's supporters naturally urged that, as Dimmy had backed himself to make ( three times as many runs as his opponent, he had failed, and had there- * fore lost the wager. "Not a bit ! not a. b\t !" chuckled Dimmy. "I backed myself to make tkrea times as many runs as Wright, and I have just succeeded in doing so. \VriglH scored 0. I scored exactly 3 times ovei o— which, of cpurse, is 0. I maintain, therefore, that .Wright has lost." The umpires Were so tickled with little Dimmy's mathematical ingenuity that they promptly decided in his favour— a«d thus "Mite" triumphed over "Wright."

"Africa was once the Dark Continent," sighed the Kaffir chief, " but it's getting quite khaki-coloured now." Old Mrs. Darley is a pattern of household economy. She says she has made a pair of socks last fifteen years by only k-nittinst new feet to them every winte't and n«w legs to them every other au* tumn.