Page 3 Advertisements Column 4

Dunstan Times, Issue 2481, 17 May 1909, Page 3

EXTRAORDINARY PEDESTHJBfN ] FEAT. * M I Augustus 1 . "Aw, Gawge, oldfel', b6W »re you ?" i George ; " Oh, I'm all broke up. Took I terrible long walk in the country yesterday. Must have gone ’bout twenty miles." j I Augustus: "Oh, come oil! Say three, BOW." George; ” What d'you mean ? I assure you, ’pon me honour, 1 got so far off that there wasn't a single board of a real estate agent in sight." Augustus: " Oh, excuse me. I’d no idea you were a long-distunce pedestrian. Never t | got out to the bach-woods myself." j CONVERTED KITTENS. I Small boy: "Do you want to buy «om« Presbyterian Kittens ?" Minister: " Kittens! no ;go along." A week later the boy calls at the " Episcopal rectory" and asks the rector if he wants to buy some ’Pixopal kittens. Rector replies, " Episcopal kittens! Why, R never heard of such a thing." Just then the Presbyterian minister who was calling at the house came cut and said. " Look here! Aren’t you the boy that came I to my house a week ago to sell me some Presbyterian kittens ?’’ j Small boy ; " Yes, sir.y j Minister: "Well, how is it they are ' Episcopal kittens now ?" Small boy: " Why you see when I brung 'em to you they hadn't got their eyes oper yet.” ■ Exit Presbvterian minister. A BURGLAR IN A BOX. At five o'clock one evening a large boi was hauled and delivered by a drayman a! a railway station. He delivered a/ the same I time an illegibly written letter. The box j had the following address marked on it: | “B. A. Smith, Sheffield." It was rolled j into the office and left unnoticed. At 11.49 j just as the -.fight’s business was being closed i up, the porter went to the box to gel hie 1 coat. In lifting it he found that one end had gone into and was caught in the box Surprised, lie pave the coat a jerk and a . board flew off the box and revealed the fool I and leg of a live man. The porter called the acting nipnt clerk, who came with a I pistol and ordeted the man in the box t« remain inside. Notice was sent to the police station, when a policeman came and took the fellow from the box. lie had in his possession a jug of water and a bag ' One large board was held at one end by a I leather strap that was arranged so that it | could be Looked inside. At the polico I station he f,avc his name as Bryan Smith The plan was to rob 'he office after the night force had lelt. In his anxiety to see what the clerk was doing he opened the box and rolled out, and as the porter came I be suddenly drew the board shut and caught I the tail u 1 the coat. If he had not blundered, | the office would have been robbed by him 1 and his companions whom he would bav# ' let in. I Australian LLIA N 0 E SSUII A N C E COMPANY Capital Lunds ... £450,000. The WE VLTHIEST and PIiEMIER Australian Company. Local Agent;— Mr H. E; STEVENS. j All Risks accepted at Lowest Rates. Loss?? settled Promptly. 1 A. J. SULLIVAN, j Chief Agent for Otago. E. W. ATTFIELD, i ' Butcher, Waikerikeri Valley, Clyde, HAS Pleasure in intimating to the public that o iClyde that his carts will make regular visits on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays, when only the primest meat i will be ofiered for sale. BEEF, MUTTON, LAMB, Etc. A TRIAL SOLICITED. 4m. W HBiaicßftliltC BOOTMAKER, CLYDE. # Boots and Shoes unde to measure. KIT GUARANTEED. Repairs Neatly Executed. All work will be on STRIOTLYnCASH LINES Prices Moderate, Ernest ITaylor, BAKER & CONFECTIONER 1 I Sunderland Street,. Clyde, Has pleasure in intimating to the public of Clyde and district that he 1 has commenced business as a Baker I and Confectioner, in newly erected 1 premises adjoining B. Naylor and ! Son’s, Clyde. all goods a specialty I 1 i i I f 1 i ] i I i 1 1 1 i p ( I I I I I 1 \ ( \ 1 ) 1 I 1 1 I ] t c ( i I ( i 1 I I 1 I 1 a trial solicited if to Mothers -Are you broken net by a sick child suffering witn of cutting teeth ? Go at once tc it and get a bottle 0 Mrs Win* loothino Syrup* It wil relieve sufferer immediately. It is per* .rrnless atrl pleasant to’taste. It ' natural quiet sleep by relieving 1 from pain. and the little cherub •as hriedu ae .. '"itton B the child it sottens the gun is 1 pain redoxes wind regulates v\p and is the best known remedy ] and diarrhoea, whether arid (thing or other causes. Mr* w 1 10thing Syrup; sold by Msdioio. iverywbef*-