THE SALARY LIST

Dunstan Times, Issue 2481, 17 May 1909, Page 3

THE SALARY LIST

The Royal household costs in the aggregate £132,000 a year in salaries, while an average sum of £172,000 a year is paid to "the butchef and baker and candlestick maker," and the other tradespeople who feed the members of the household. The scandalous waste which characterised the regime of the Hanoverian Princes could only be reformed very slowly; and if the Royal household is to-day practically one of the best regulated in the kingdom, the result has not been obtained without much opposition and the exercise of great patience. If has been found impossible to sufficiently centralise the powers and responsibilities ol individual members of the household, so many interests —even political ones are at stake. It will hardly be credited that even now jt is the Lord Steward who still orders the fires to be laid, but the Lord Chamberlain alone who can cause them to be lighted! An employe in receipt of £6O a year arranges the caudles, but two others, at a salary of £IOO each, are required to light them as well as the lamps, while it costs £492 to have the table laid out by live functionaries, and so on. But all this is nothing as compared with the wasteful disorder which prevailed of yore. Carelessness and negligence were rampant—authority was nowhere. Those who liked to do so could enter the palace as they would walk into a publichouse, and one evening (so lax were the regulations) a boy was found hidden under a sofa close to her Majesty’s private apartments. A CURIOUS ADVENTURE. - As nobody was charged to conduct the guests through the labyrinth of corridors, they were exposed to adventures similar to that one which happened to M. Guizot. Invited to spend a few days at Windsor, one evening, after the Queen had retired, the celebrated diplomatist remained alone in the salon with a political personage whose conversation had engrossed him. When at last the two gentlemen separated, ths French Ambassador soon realised the unpleasant fact that he was lost in the castle! Afte'r many turnings and windings he came to a door which he thought he recognised as his own ; entering, he found himself in a kind of ante-room ; he opened a second door and --0 horror!—perceived a lady in a large dressing-room. To shut the door and run away was the affair of an instant; but judge of the unfortunate diplomatist’s feelings when next day the Queen said to him, with her charming, rather malicious smile, “ Well, M. I’Ambassadeur, so you paid us a little visit last night ?” LADIES-IN-WAITING, The feminine court of the sovereign comprise a Mistress of the Robes, who is generally a duchess, and " goes out” with the Ministry; eight Ladies of the Bedchamber, and eight " Bedchamber Women,” who are relieved fortnightly. Besides these aristocratic dames, there are eight Maids of Honour, who must at least be granddaughters of earls, and whose " wait,” in pairs, lasts a nonth—much too long for some of them, who arc not equal to the fatiguing nature of the duties imposed upon them. The Queen, besides being in the good old days an indefatigable walker and rider, could remain standing for an indefinite period ; and as, of course, no one is allowed to sit down until her Majesty sets the example, it will be readily understood the unfortunate ladies-’n-waiting had many a maurais quart d'henre. The Queen is now never seen on horseback ; she walks with a stick, and drives her favourite donkey instead of the ponies of which she used to be so fond. Those who have seen her Majesty at Aix-les-Bains are aware that the donkey and the little " trap,” or bath-chair, follow the Sovereign everywhere —even to Grasse. FOND OF PIC-NICS. What is called her Majesty's " privy purse,” with which no Administration has the right to meddle, is only £60,000 a year, as against the £440,000 of the Civil List; but the Sovereign’s affairs have been so well managed that her fortune (she banks at Coutts') is said to be close upon £30,000,000, some of which has been left to her by enthusiastic subjects. Never under any circumstances has she asked for an augmentation of the Civil List; and for that Sir Robert Peel thanked her in the House ol Commons in 1845, immediately after she had entertained several foreign sovereigns with a magnificence worthy of the English Court. The Queen’s life at Grasse will be pretty much the same as it was at Aix-les-Bains Her Majesty rises early, and after a light breakfast and the perusal of her private letters and despatches—she is not over-burdened with the latter, uiilcjS in times of exceptional public excitement—she goes fur a drive until it is lunch time If an excursion has been settled upon, of course the carriages are brought round ; if not, the donkey and bath-chair make their appearance. and then the Queen is accompanied only by one attendant, or, at the most, two persons. Her Majesty is very fond of "the cup that cheers, but not inebriates" ; and she is never better pleased than when she and her suite set forth in the afternoon, bound for some romantic spot where one ot the party makes tea. Teacups and saucers, cake and bread and butter, and some good Souchong are taken in the carriage, so that all that is wanted is hot water. Neither in the mountain of Savoy, nor in those of the Maritime Alps, are there any stragglers to interfere with the enjoyment of the little part)’- .

Teacher (reading)— hj Let down your sable shade, O night, And hide this sad earth from my sight"— That’s poetry. How would you express the same idea in prose? \\ell Johnny ? Johnny : " Pull down the blind. Passer-by (to Tommy, who had just been fi editing); " Wouldn't your father whip >ou if he knew you had been fightmg • ‘ Tommy: "Well, that depends. If the other boy whipped me, pop would whip me too • but if I licked the ether boy, pop wonk 4 x tm&* " ””"