A READER’S MEDLEY

Dominion, Volume 28, Issue 115, 8 February 1935, Page 9

A READER’S MEDLEY

The Tea Drinker!' I •‘lt may not be generally realised,” said Mr. Pimplebury, who had asked me to afternoon tea oh the occasion of his annual birthday, “that New Zea--landers, when the size of the country is taken into consideration, have been proved to drink as much tea per capita as the Inhabitants of any other country in the world; in fact, possible a little more. ■ ‘

“You are no doubt surmising,” continued Mr. Pimplebury, “just how far tea drinkers in this country would reach if placed end to end. Let me tell you that the inveterate tea drinker is never in the unhappy position of having to be placed end to end, and that therefore your, conjectures are illogical.” Disregarding my startled gasp, Mr. Pimplebury went on. “It is indeed pleasing to note that such a refreshing and innocuous beverage as tea should receive this well merited attention. The phrase, “the cup that cheers but not inebriates’ may no doubt be familiar to you. At the same time, although statistics do not bear this out, I have long had a lingering suspicion that our younger generation in particular is more partial to beverages of a less desirable nature,” and he frowned severely at me. . “In my young days,” said Mr. Pimplebury, “I could • put down as many as 20 cups of tea a day without being any the worse for it. In these degenerate times no young man would think of doing such a thing. But you will excuse me, as I make a point of visiting my aunt Cecilia every year on my birthday.”

I happened to meet Mr. Pimplebury on Lambton Quay several hours later. He approached me with his usual benignity, but his voice contained a note of unwonted solemnity. "Hie,” be said. “Many happy returnsh of the day. Ish my birthday.”—R.