HIS MAJESTY THE PIG.

Dominion, Volume 4, Issue 964, 3 November 1910, Page 5

HIS MAJESTY THE PIG.

A SHOW-CROUND IDYLL. (By Wi.) When my esteemed collaborates in the press-room at the show ground suggested that I had better go and' "do the pigs," I proceeded, without enthusiasm, to "do" them. ■ I am not enamoured of pigs. They are not inspiring. They are fat, clumsy, stupid. There is an indescribable 'air of vulgarity 'about them.' Was it possible, I reflected, as I strolled across to the far. corner of the ground, that I should be able to so adjust my point of view that I might,' for the occasion, go into raptures over pigs, which I was about to "do"? I doubted it. I tried to call up some appropriate sentiment, but I could think of nothing but-such phrases as.; ."pig's trotters," "pearla before swme," "silk purses and sows' ears," and so on. . Certain of my acquaintances whom I had designated "Pigs I" rose before myi mental vision and wallowed iii niy memories. I thought of one "PiggJ'i" whose personality so fitted the appellation that I long ago decided that he 'must have been a pig in a previous incarnation; a squat stump, of a man, for whom the refinement of physical torture would not be half severe, enough, and so reflecting, I arrived at the pig pons, most norribly biased against the occupants. As I leaned over the rail in front of His Mcst High Pigship,. "Highclere Financier," and gazed upon the opulent sides and generous hams of the mighty champion, the Pig of Pigs, there approached a man who positively shono with enthusiasm. "There's a pig for ye," he observed, putting his thumbs into the arm-holes of his waistcoat, and feasting his eyes upon the champion. "What d'ye think of 'im?" I replied that I was unable, at the moment, to find words to express my sentiments. Up till then, I explained to him, I had always considererd that pigs were common, not to say, vulgar. "Common? Vulgar?' , ho exclaimed. "Now look 'ere. There ain't nothin' common or vulgar about that 'air pig. Look at 'im. Think wot it's cost to produce a pig like that. ■ Somethink enormous—'undreds o' pounds. 'E's a blooming nobleman, 'e is. Got blue blood in 'im.". I regarded the Pig of Pigs with increased respect. I saw him in a new' light, as it were. Here was a pig of the ancient nobility, whoso illustrious ancestor might possibly have been eaten by William the Conqueror, and whose aristocratic progeny might conceivably have provided pigs' trotters for the royal menage throughout subsequent generations. And there, as he lay upon the straw, his eyes half-closed in voluptuous- contentment, all unconscious of the "dark and dismal day when the inexorable blade of some sacrilegious assassin would end him, he seemed to swell in majesty before me. I marked the great curves of his superb sides, the mighty chest, the broad back, tho latent ferocity of .the powerful head, and understood the man's ecstasy. He was a beautiful pig, as beautiful in his pigly way as is the perfect horse, the perfect man or woman. Mentally, I apologised to the whole family of pigs.