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Cromwell Argus, Volume LXVIII, Issue 3484, 30 August 1937, Page 2

Two Negroes had quarrelled over a game of cards. The dispute grew more and more heated, and suddenly one of the men reached for his hip pocket. "Niggah,” he said, "what’s de date?” "I ain’t payin’ no heed to dates,” was the reply. “I just thought you’d like to know,” said the first Negro, "’cause jest twelve months from to-day you’ll have been dead a year.”

"You took a day off saying you felt ill. Yet I saw you at the races —looking far from ill.” "Ah, sir, you should have seen how sick I was after the third race!”

The new vicar was surprised as he entered the vestry to see the verger, who was counting the collection, take half a crown from the plate and put it in his pocket. The remonstrance which seemed imminent was checked by the ready explanation: "That s the half crown, sir, that I’ve led off with these thirty years and more.”